


Broken Bonedaries

by sin_bin



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, First Time, Happy Sans, M/M, POV Papyrus, POV Sans, Sensitive bones, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-26 21:15:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 22,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6256168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sin_bin/pseuds/sin_bin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Skeleton cuddles! Bone-on-bone snuggle action. Tender embraces of the osteological kind.<br/>Maybe more. </p>
<p>Fluff without plot.</p>
<p>Edit: Huge bonus chapter added! More utterly self-indulgent fluff. Sans and Papyrus deal with some things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

You weren't cranky. Annoyed, maybe, at your brother neglecting another one of his duties, one of the few he still regularly performed even when you didn't nag him about it, but you definitely weren't cranky. 

Really, you had no reason to be unhappy at all. Your day had been highly successful and productive, as every day tended to be when you were a highly successful and productive skeleton. 

You stayed vigilant on your patrol through the woods. You kept all your puzzles in order, ready for a human to trip them and be confounded by your genius. You even talked to captain Undyne about your future in the royal guard - She seemed vaguely uncomfortable when you asked her about it, but eventually declared that, starting next week, she'd be giving you special one-on-one training to make sure your abilities were at their absolute peak before she let you in. 

You definitely didn't let out a joyful squeak at hearing that. That sort of behaviour would be entirely unbefitting of a dignified, powerful, respected royal guardsman... but then you supposed you had yet to officially become one, so it was probably okay. Undyne seemed to approve of your enthusiasm, at least.

You sink deeper under the covers of your cool race car bed, staring at the ceiling, your enthusiasm slowly fading as you take in the deafening silence surrounding you. You had all these good news, and yet... no one to share them with. 

It was way past time for Sans to come home. Normally, he would have headed to your room to read to you and tuck you in a full hour ago, but apparently he had, once again, picked the worst possible day to instead waste his life away at the... "restaurant" not too far from your house. 

At least, you can't think of any other place he could possibly be at. You groan in frustration, turning on your side. You really don't want to have to go over there to pick him up - possibly literally, even the effort of stuffing himself with unhealthy food apparently too much for him to not pass out at the counter - the place was nothing less than vile to you. As soon as you poked your head in, you were assaulted and overwhelmed by countless uncomfortable sensations. The heavy smell of grease hanging in the air, the patrons' eyes on you as you stepped inside, the low, indecipherable murmur of everyone's conversations and the sight of them messily eating, it was all just... too much.

No, you definitely wouldn't ruin your good day by going there. If your brother didn't care about... sticking to the routine you'd established, then so be it. It was his loss, really. There was, after all, no way the company at Grillby's could be more enjoyable than yours.

None at all.

You sigh, restlessly shifting under the covers, rolling over to face the door -

"hey, bro."

"NYEH!!!"

Oh god, you wish he wouldn't do that. Just... appear right next to your face without so much as knocking first. You realise that you just squished yourself into the far corner of your bed with your blanket protectively held up to your face - you'll have to work on being less easily startled, you can't afford to react like this in case of a human ambush - and, somewhat sheepishly, relax into a more casual position.

You open your mouth to say something. Close it again. Get your index finger into wagging position, ready to scold him, then put it back down. Feel the urge to hold out your arms and wordlessly ask for a hug, but fight it. 

You settle for looking to the side while fiddling with the edge of your blanket, unsure of what to say, where to start, how to feel. A part of you just wants to finally share your earlier happiness with him, another wants to let him know how irresponsibly he's been acting, and another, smaller part is looking for... reassurance of some kind? Your brother just stands there, lazy grin in place as always, one eyebrow raised, waiting for you to talk. 

"ARE YOU... ARE YOU STILL GOING TO READ TO ME?"

"'course, bro. why d'you think i'm here?"

His smile settles into something softer, the change almost imperceptible to anyone who hadn't spent their entire life trying to read his ridiculously subtle expressions, as he walks over to your bookshelf and inspects the collection of quality titles you'd amassed over the years.

"sorry for rattling your bones like that."

He turns around and gives you a wink. You already know what's coming.

"i guess you could say i -"

"SANS, NO."

"i was just about to say that -"

"KEEP IT TO YOURSELF!"

"c'mon, i -"

"SANS, CAN'T YOU TELL I'M TAKING AN INCREDIBLY STERN-UM TONE OF VOICE WITH YOU???"

Your brother's hand freezes halfway to the bookshelf.

"uh..."

He's hesitating. You've successfully knocked him off balance, you just need one more to seal the deal. Your eyes dart around the room, searching for inspiration...

"...IN FACT, I'M GOING TO BE INCREDIBLY CROSS-BONES WITH YOU IF YOU FINISH THAT SENTENCE!!!"

Wow. If you hadn't been the one to say that, and if everything you said wasn't inherently great, you would have considered that one extraordinarily awful.

"heh..."

Sans grabs a book and turns back to face you.

"not bad, bro. i guess you win."

Another wink. Pride swells in your chest and you break out into a genuine grin. To have beaten the master of inappropriately timed puns at his own game, truly there is nothing you cannot -

"i won't pa-tell-a-nother stupid joke tonight."

Your jaw drops. Your brows furrow. You can't even believe your non-existent ears. The nerve of this monster! The sheer gall!!! You retreat under the covers with an outraged "NYEH". 

Sans' chuckles are muffled by your newfound Pun Protection Layer as he gently pokes the area he suspects your head may be hiding under. "you still with me, buddy?"

You risk a glance outside. Sans is leaning forward against the bedframe, propping his head up with one hand and holding one of Fluffy Bunny's Excellent Adventures in the other.

"c'mon, i promise that's all of 'em. i've pretty much already had my fill of bad puns today, anyway."

You narrow your eyes. The concept of your brother actually having a limit on how many horrendous skeleton jokes he could come up with in one day was not one you had ever considered before. You don't even want to imagine the sheer number it must have taken for him to tire himself out.

He holds the book up so you can see the cover. It's one of your favourites. Of course, all of them are your favourites in different ways, but -

"peace offering?"

"...FINE."

You scoot over as Sans climbs into your bed. He settles down next to you, leaning against the headboard with the book in his lap while you lie down and get cozy. His presence feels comforting and familiar, and you can already feel your earlier worries melting away.

He begins to read - not before giving a theatrical cough, entirely unnecessary before his traditionally lackluster performance, maybe you should switch places and show him how to really breathe life into a story some day - but you aren't actually paying attention to the words. You've known each and every one of them by heart for years. 

Instead, you simply focus on the low, monotonous rumble of your brother's voice. There's a certain calm, gentle tone to it that you've never heard directed at anyone but yourself, and right now you're craving that kind of intimacy more than anything else.

You close your eyes. Let your head sink deeper into your fluffy pillow. Squirm around in a way that just so happens to bring you closer to Sans, your arm now pressing against his thigh through the blanket. Sigh softly. This is pretty much the only thing that gets you into the right state of mind to even attempt to sleep. 

An out-of-place pause and a slight shift in his posture make you realise that your brother must have noticed you... crowding him a bit more than strictly necessary. You feel a slight flush of embarrassment, deciding not to open your eyes and to let him believe that you were just really, really sleepy.

When he continues reading, you feel a hand coming to rest on top of your skull, somewhat tentatively, and - Oh. He's petting you. Gosh. He runs his fingers across the smooth bone carefully, like he's afraid you'll collapse into a pile of dust if he so much as brushes against an uncomfortable spot. It's not like he's never done this before, he just never gets any more confident at it.

Nevertheless, the soft caresses are satisfying. If you were at all capable of it, you'd be purring. As it is, you settle for smiling gratefully and pushing your face up into his palm. He lets out a chuckle at that, and you finally open your eyes to see him smiling back at you - He looks tired, but happy. You feel warm inside.

All too soon, the story reaches its end. You're not really ready to be left alone for the rest of the night, so, being the excellent tactician that you are, you devise a downright devious plan to make your brother stay a while longer. This is exactly the kind of situation you've been preparing for by studying battle scenarios for most of your life. You're so determined to reach your goal, you even manage to resist the urge to mischievously giggle to yourself and give your intentions away.

"WAIT, SANS, I WANT TO SEE THE PICTURE."  
"hmm? which one?"  
"THE ONE OF THE HAPPY ENDING! WHEN FLUFFY BUNNY'S FAMILY IS REUNITED AND THEY'RE ALL LOOKING AT THE... THING...TOGETHER."  
He looks at the page, trying to identify the "thing" you're referring to.  
"IT'S MY FAVOURITE."

You don't make a move to sit up, and you can't see the book from your current position. When Sans realises this, he slowly slides down to lie next to you, shoulder to shoulder, and holds the two-page spread above your heads.   
"what "thing" do you mean, bro?"  
This is it. Your moment to strike. You raise your hand to point at it. "THAT VAGUELY THREATENING, GLOWING ORB IN THE DISTANCE THERE."  
"oh", Sans says, "that's the su-"  
He doesn't get to finish explaining. 

Your pointing arm suddenly darts forward to grab the edge of the blanket your brother is lying on and pull it towards yourself. He doesn't even have time to react beyond widening his eyes in surprise - though, admittedly, you suspect his response time to be far below average, and the incentive needed to get him to move at a speed higher than that of a snail out for a relaxing stroll to be larger than anything you could offer or threaten him with - before you slip out from underneath the covers and lie on your side to face him in one swift movement.

So much for step one. You can't help yourself, you stop in your tracks and give him a second to figure out what's about to happen, grinning impishly with your arm still reaching behind him to hold on to the corner of the blanket. You don't get to surprise him like this very often, so you're thoroughly enjoying having the upper hand for once, watching his face intently as it dawns on him, his expression betraying amusement and... a hint of nervousness? 

"oh."

You pull him close enough to tuck his head under your chin.

"oh boy."

He's offering no resistance whatsoever. 

"are you sure-"

You rock to one side to gain a bit of momentum before finally rolling the two of you backwards, once, twice, thank god this blanket is so big and comfy when it's all spread out, and then you just lie there, taking in the feeling of slightly awkward triumph. 

You have succesfully become a bone burrito.

"NYEH HEH HEH! I'VE CAPTURED YOU, BROTHER!"   
He wiggles around a bit, but, of course, "THERE'S NO ESCAPE FROM THE GREAT PAPYRUS!" 

It doesn't take Sans very long to accept his fate.   
"dang." He struggles to look up at you. "now that's what i call "thoroughly japed"."   
He winks, though you can barely see it from this angle. "that was a pretty clever trick, bro. got me good."   
A surge of pride makes you puff out your chest, or at least attempt to do so, your ribcage is already pressed pretty tightly against your brother's, and, wow. You were so focused on your plan, you'd barely even noticed how close you'd gotten and how nice it felt.

Sans relaxes against you, seemingly realising that you're not about to let him go. "this is probably the only trap i've ever been caught in that i don't even wanna escape from. it's seriously impressive."  
"NYEH HEH HEH..."  
"that level of trap effectiveness is pretty much unheard of. deserves some kind of trap-making prize."  
You'd like to hug him, but realise too late that your mobility is greatly decreased when you're part of a double stuffed blanket burrito.  
"YES, WELL... THE ONLY DOWNSIDE IS..."  
With some effort, you manage to wiggle your arms free and wrap them around your brother. "THAT THERE IS NO ESCAPE *FOR* THE GREAT PAPYRUS, EITHER..."  
If you unrolled yourself, you'd inevitably be letting your victim get away, too. Of course, whether this particular "victim" would actually bother to make a break for it was debatable, but...

"that is unfortunate."  
His hands are resting on your chest, thumbs lightly trailing back and forth over your ribs. You hum contently.  
"but if you ask me, the mark of a true trap master is finding the right one for every situation. a mutual trap is perfectly fine for... this specific scenario."   
You rub his back gratefully, maybe a bit too roughly, his spine slightly arching away from your touch. "YOU'RE SO RIGHT, SANS!"  
After only a moment's hesitation, you tilt your head downwards and softly click your teeth against his forehead. "THANK YOU."   
He looks up at you for a second and you catch a hint of surprise, or maybe even embarrassment, in his eyes. "i'm just telling the truth. but, uh, you're welcome."

A comfortable silence settles over you. You focus on the way your brother feels in your arms, warm and right and completely wonderful, your whole being practically vibrating with all the positive energy directed at you. Just as there is no worse feeling than being attacked by someone who really wants to hurt you, there is nothing better than being close to someone full of affection and admiration for you, being touched by someone who wants you to feel good. You know you are safe, and wanted, and cared for, and you hope he can feel your love, too.

Slowly, almost unnoticeably, Sans is nuzzling his face against your sternum. You smile, feeling all the tension slowly leaving his body as he peacefully dozes off...

Wait!!! No! He can't fall asleep yet, you completely forgot to tell him the good news! It can't wait until tomorrow, it just can't, you've been carrying it around with you for way too long already!

"SANS!!!"  
He reluctantly lifts one of his eyelids.  
"I HAVE SOMETHING INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT TO TELL YOU, BROTHER!"  
A groan. "does it have to be right now?" His eye falls closed again. "it's getting pretty late, bro."  
You'll never understand your brother's insistence on spending twelve hours a day essentially lying unconscious. Usually in much less comfortable positions than your current one, too.  
"YES, IT HAS TO BE RIGHT NOW! YOU AND I BOTH KNOW THAT YOU'RE GOING TO SPEND ALL DAY NAPPING AT YOUR STATION, ANYWAY!"  
That earns you another "ugh", but you know just how to get him to wake up and pay attention to you. Without so much as a warning, you let yourself fall on your back, then push the two of you off the mattress with your foot to start rolling and unravel the plushy prison you'd both been confined to.

"whelp." He ends up lying on top of you, a total dead weight, and soon slides off, landing flat on his face and seemingly not interested in doing anything to change that. "i guess you just needed to get something off your chest, huh?" Pff, okay, the timing was pretty good on that one - no, no, what are you thinking, this is a betrayal of the highest order! You shoot him a reprimanding look. "SANS! YOU PROMISED!"   
"sorry, bro. i'm all ears. well, i'm actually no ears, but-" "AAAAAA!"

You hook your arms under his shoulders and he goes ragdoll, letting you pull him into your lap and gently clasp a hand over his mouth.  
"SHUSH! AND LISTEN!" He leans against your ribcage as you loosely embrace him. "SO, I TALKED TO CAPTAIN UNDYNE TODAY!"   
"did she say anything... fishy?" "NO... OH, COME ON, SANS, NO!" Your smile falls. Why did he never know when to stop? "THIS IS REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME! I'VE BEEN WAITING TO TELL YOU ALL DAY, AND NOW YOU WON'T EVEN TAKE ME SERIOUSLY!" Your words actually seem to affect him, the self-satisfied look leaving his face, his hands coming up to cover yours. "i'm sorry, papyrus. go on, i wanna hear it." 

You take a deep breath before continuing. "WELL, SHE SAID I WON'T BE READY TO JOIN THE ROYAL GUARD FOR... A WHILE YET. WHICH, I ADMIT, IS A LITTLE DISAPPOINTING." Sans threads his fingers through yours. It's probably just meant to be a reassuring gesture, but you can't help feeling a little flustered at it. Gosh, his hands are so much smaller than yours, it's adorable. 

"NOT THAT I'LL LET THAT DISCOURAGE ME! YOU SEE, WHEN I ASKED HER WHAT, SPECIFICALLY, I STILL HAVE TO WORK ON..." You carefully disentangle your fingers from his and turn your hands over, offering your palms to him. "SHE GAVE ME THIS BIG, GOOFY GRIN, AND SAID I WOULDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THAT..." You'd expected him to hold them, but instead he's softly running his phalanges across yours, thumbs rubbing over each of the bones in your wrist. You barely suppress a shudder. "BECAUSE... BECAUSE, STARTING NEXT WEEK, SHE'LL GIVE ME SPECIAL ONE-ON-ONE TRAINING THAT IS SURE TO UNCOVER MY TRUE POTENTIAL AND SET ME UP TO ACHIEVE EVEN GREATER GREATNESS IN THE FUTURE! NYEH HEH HEH!"

Sans cranes his neck up and backwards to look at you, still playing with your hands. "that's awesome, bro." His face is so close. Before you know it, you're leaning down to nuzzle him, wanting more of this easy affection, more of these pleasant sensations, practically feeling your body being pulled towards his. For a second he stills, and you fear you might have already gone too far, somehow, it's so hard to tell sometimes, but then he reciprocates openly and all is right in the world. "i'm so proud of you." Wowie. Why had you ever been worried about this? How could you have thought it'd turn out any other way?

You effortlessly pick him up and turn him around so he's properly sitting in your lap, his arms wrapping around your neck and his head resting against your shoulder. God, you just want more of... of him. Of all this. It's so good. It's too good, and you can't quite wrap your head around why that would be a problem, but you know it is. You know you're not supposed to crave your sibling's closeness this much. "YOU KNOW, I DON'T THINK UNDYNE IS DOING THAT FOR ANYONE ELSE. I THINK, MAYBE, SHE REALLY... LIKES ME?" 

Sans locks eyes with you, bumping your foreheads together. "'course, bro. everyone should like you." "NYEH HEH, OF COURSE, BUT I MEAN, I THINK SHE MIGHT... I THINK SHE MIGHT ACTUALLY WANT TO BE MY FRIEND?" His eyes widen a bit, and then he looks happier than you've seen him in weeks, like this means at least as much to him as it does to you. You want him to look like this all the time. You want to make him this happy every day. You rub your face against his again, smiling brightly. "what, are you training for the no-nose nuzzle championship?" His tone of voice is light and teasing, and just this once, you think you'll allow it.

You lean back and your brother follows your movements, leaning forward until your ribcages are pressed together once again. His hands are sliding up and down your shoulders now, caressing your clavicles, occasionally brushing against the vertebrae of your neck, and you can't help the small shiver that runs through you. You hope he doesn't notice how this is making you feel. You hope he does notice, and doesn't mind. You hope he'll keep doing this, on purpose, you hope he'll look at you with love in his eyes and ask you what feels good and then do just that -

You realise your eyes are closed, whole body gone rigid in fear of acting wrongly and messing up... whatever's happening here, and when you force them open again, you see Sans, giving you his trademark lazy, sleepy smile, shifting in your lap to press his teeth against the side of your jaw, and you can't take this, you can't take this at all. 

You finally exhale, accompanied by a small, desperate noise, and decide that there's no way this situation is platonic anymore, and even if it is, you'd feel gross indulging in it without letting him know how it feels to you, and then you don't let yourself think about it anymore, you raise a shaky hand to cup your brother's chin, gently tilt his head upwards and bring your mouths together.

Both of your eyes are wide open, and, oh, that's not a good sign, you don't have much experience, but you're pretty sure this isn't how kisses are supposed to go. You pull back almost immediately, trembling slightly, oh god, you messed up, you have to fix this, you have to think of something to say that can fix this - "huh." Sans' voice, as calm as ever, pulls you out of your panic spiral and back to reality. "you ok, bro?" You nod, a bit too quickly, and find yourself completely tongue-tied despite your usual grand eloquence and your lack of any such appendage.

"did you... mean to do that?" You're confused, was it possible to mistake that for an accident? Could you play it off as one? "nevermind, stupid question." Dang it. That's one potential escape plan down. "what i'm trying to ask is, uh, i guess..." He has the common decency to look a bit embarrassed about this conversation, but doesn't seem particularly put off or scandalised by what just happened. Heck, he's still sitting in your lap. You don't dare hope, but it's at least nice to know he probably won't hate you forever. You don't think you could cope with that. "did you... you know. did you mean it? i mean, was that like, a conscious decision, that you would maybe make again?"

You don't know how to respond to that. Not because you don't know the truth, every fiber of your soul screaming yes, please, all the time, but because you can't figure out what the right answer is. Is he giving you a way out of this horribly awkward situation, expecting you to take it so things can go back to normal, or is he hoping for confirmation? Does he even care either way? He seems remarkably detached, still, and you're torn between envying him and being mad at him for, again, seemingly not taking your feelings seriously.

You're well aware that an approach as simplistic as that rarely works in social matters as complicated as this, but you still decide to just... ask him. It takes you a while to find your voice again. "WOULD... WOULD THAT BE BAD? IF I DID?" His expression softens, and he actually winks at you. 

"nah." 

Well, that was anti-climactic. Relief washes over you, so intensely that it's making your head spin, and you're not sure you can believe this, but you're sure your brother wouldn't lie to you. "anything that makes you happy is a good thing, bro."

Something catches in your throat, or at least it feels like it. Surely he meant to add "so long as it doesn't hurt anyone else"? That was the part you were worried about, after all. You could live with being a weirdo or an outcast, heck, you already were one, but you couldn't deal with doing anything he didn't want, shouldn't want, surely there was a reason why this sort of thing was taboo, surely it was dangerous, you don't want to hurt him, don't even want to risk it, ever, he can't just brush off your justified concern like that, and, he's kissing you. Your train of thought derails, violently. His eyes are closed, this time, and your hands travel upwards to cup his cheeks as if on instinct, your thumbs softly caressing his face as you close your eyes, too.

It feels... different from all the other touches you've received tonight, the usual soft warmth accompanied by a strange, tingly feeling, pleasant, but altogether new to you, and you realise your brother's intentions must have shifted. Your head is swimming. You need to get closer to him, right now, you need to reassure yourself that this is really happening. One of your hands goes to the back of his head, firmly pushing your mouths together, slowly dragging your teeth across his, and this time he's the one shivering. Your other hand goes underneath his shirt and you slide your fingers between his vertebrae while pulling his pelvis closer with your legs, crossing them behind his back, and... there. You're completely enveloping him. This is amazing. You want to stay like this forever.

Sans is clinging to you like his life depends on it, burying his head in the crook of your neck. You decide to wait for him to say something before you go any further, still anxious about possibly upsetting him. "you should've... you could've just told me that you feel... like this. about me." He threads his fingers through your ribs. The direct contact feels even better, more intense than just embracing each other with your clothes in the way. "i'm your big bro. i don't ever want you to feel like... like there's anything we can't talk about." Your brows furrow slightly. "WELL, SANS, WE HAVEN'T REALLY TALKED ABOUT THIS, YET. WE JUST KIND OF... IMMEDIATELY GOT GRABBY WITH EACH OTHER?" He chuckles at that, but it sounds strained, nervous. You softly run your knuckles along the inner curve of his spine, hoping it will soothe him. 

"FIRST OF ALL, YOU HAVEN'T EVEN TOLD ME IF YOU ACTUALLY FEEL THE SAME WAY! I GET THAT YOU JUST WANT ME TO BE HAPPY, BUT YOUR FEELINGS ARE IMPORTANT, TOO!" He cringes noticeably. "well, i..." Looks off to the side. "of course i do." Tightens his hold on your ribs. "i, uh... i have for a while now." 

On the one hand, you're very glad to hear that, but on the other, the hypocrisy of the statement doesn't escape you. "THEN... SHOULDN'T YOU HAVE SAID SOMETHING, TOO?" "god, no." His reply is immediate, accompanied by a dark, bitter laugh. You don't like the sound of it at all. "i couldn't... do that to you. i mean. my feelings aren't your burden to bear, y'know?" He leans back, looks downward, only his forehead making contact with your chest, now. "you deserve better, bro." His hands drop to his sides. Already you miss them. "this is... man, what was i thinking. this is a really bad idea." "BUT YOU JUST SAID-" "i'm sorry, papyrus. i'm really sorry. i shouldn't have... i shouldn't have taken advantage-" 

"OH MY GOD, SANS! YOU DIDN'T TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME!" You put your hands on his shoulders, equal parts worried and aggravated. "I'M PRETTY SURE YOU DON'T EVEN REALLY THINK THAT, EITHER! I MEAN, IF ANYONE WAS TOO FORCEFUL, IT WAS ME!" That finally makes him look up at you. You're sure he's about to protest, but you don't let him. "YOU CAN'T ADMONISH YOURSELF FOR DOING SOMETHING WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY REASSURING ME THAT IT'S TOTALLY OKAY WHEN I DO THE EXACT SAME THING!" His smile is as fake as it ever was, and it tugs at your soul painfully. 

"YOU ARE BLATANTLY PRIORITISING ME OVER YOURSELF, AND I WON'T ALLOW IT." You pull him into a gentle hug. He lays completely limp against you. "IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE YOU'RE ACTUALLY DOING ME ANY FAVOURS! YOU'RE JUST... FOR SOME REASON, YOU'VE JUST CONVINCED YOURSELF THAT ANYTHING YOU WANT IS BAD, AND ANYTHING I WANT IS GOOD... SO YOU'RE JUMPING FROM ONE EXTREME TO THE NEXT! FIRST, THERE'S NO PROBLEM WITH IT AT ALL BECAUSE I WANT IT, AND THEN IT'S NOTHING BUT A PROBLEM BECAUSE YOU WANT IT! NEITHER OF THOSE THINGS ARE TRUE!" You're trying very hard to understand him, to put together the little bits and pieces of insight that you've managed to gain into a coherent picture. Considering that you're unambiguously the most important person in each other's lives, it remains far more fragmented than it should be.

"MY FEELINGS ARE NOT... I'M NOT ANY BETTER OR MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU, SANS..." "of course you are. don't even say that." You sigh. He's being downright childish about this. "NO, YOU BONEHEAD. I'M GREAT AND AMAZING, AND SO ARE YOU." He doesn't respond beyond a vague grumble, and you sit in silence for a while, rubbing your brother's back in a way that hopefully comes across as comforting. Finally, an idea that might break the tense atmosphere occurs to you. 

"IN FACT... YOU STILL THINK THAT ANYTHING I WANT IS GOOD, RIGHT?" "well. basically, yeah." "SO WHAT DO YOU THINK I WANT THE MOST?" You wink at him, which is not something you've ever done before. Despite his resignation, he seems pretty amused by it. "WHAT IS THE MOST GOOD THING OUT OF ALL THE GOOD THINGS?" "um." Wow, his self-loathing must be rooted pretty deeply if he doesn't even realise what you're setting him up for.  
"being popular? helping people?"

You make an effort to smile as brightly as possible, despite feeling pretty insecure yourself. "IT'S YOU, SILLY!" "aw..." He's avoiding your eyes, looking almost bashful. It's adorable. Your soul aches for him, still, and you lean forward to plant little kisses all over his face, hoping that your affection will reach him, hoping that he'll be able to see himself the way you do. 

"god. i don't deserve you." Oh, that's not at all reassuring. You don't think you'll be able to convince him to drop this line of thinking. Not in one night, at least. "ALRIGHT. BUT CONSIDER THIS: IT DOESN'T MATTER." "what?" "IT DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU THINK YOU "DESERVE" ME, OR IF YOU ACTUALLY DO WITH REGARDS TO... WHATEVER ONE WOULD EVEN MEASURE THAT BY. IN THE END, I'M THE ONE WHO GETS TO MAKE THAT CHOICE. I CAN DETERMINE WHO I WANT TO BE WITH, BY MYSELF, ACCORDING TO MY OWN STANDARDS." He can't argue with that. If he did, he'd be denying you your agency, and you know that's the exact opposite of what he wants for you. You gently bump your forehead against his. "AND, SANS, YOU'RE MEETING ALL OF THEM."

He looks at you with utter, helpless adoration. You want to kiss him so badly. "I'VE MADE MY DECISION. SO THE ONLY THING THAT'S LEFT IS... FOR YOU TO MAKE YOURS." His face falls again, like he's pleading you not to make him do this, but you have to. He has to take that step by himself. "I JUST NEED... A SIMPLE YES OR NO. I DON'T EVEN NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOUR REASONS ARE. IF YOU GENUINELY DON'T THINK THAT THIS CAN BE GOOD, THEN YOU'RE WELCOME TO LEAVE." You can't keep the hint of sadness out of your smile. "I'LL LOVE YOU ANYWAY, SO DON'T WORRY."

Sans looks... He looks like he's about to cry. You've never, in your entire life, seen him this openly emotional, and you can barely even believe how much it hurts. You want to sweep him up in your arms and let him know that everything's alright, want to hold him close now and forever, but you don't. You just wait for him to speak.

"i can't... you're the one thing i can't stand to lose, papyrus..." His voice is even more quiet than usual, shaking slightly. You're fighting back tears of your own, now. "IT'S ALRIGHT, SANS! YOU WON'T LOSE ME, IT'S REALLY, TRULY ALRIGHT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO, I PROMISE-" "no, no, i mean, if i say yes, and i end up hurting you-" "THAT'S FINE, TOO! REALLY! I KNOW YOU'LL... I KNOW YOU'D DO YOUR BEST NOT TO... AND, I MEAN, I'M NOT PERFECT, EITHER, AND I'M SCARED, TOO, BUT EVERYONE HAS PROBLEMS, RIGHT? I'M SURE WE CAN... I'M SURE WE COULD WORK THROUGH THEM, TOGETHER, LIKE WE ALWAYS DO..."

Sans looks at you for what may very well be the longest moment of your life. You're twiddling your thumbs anxiously. Your soul feels like it's about to burst, heavy with conflicting emotions. Images of a potential future in which you try to go back to being "normal" after having been so open with each other flash through your mind, boundaries unbroken, physical affection rare and awkward, conversations formulaic and superficial, the fear of getting too close constantly at the back of your mind, please, please...

By now, your brother has been staring at the bed for a while, seemingly unable to handle holding your gaze. After what feels like years, his eyes finally find yours again, tiny pinpricks of light seeming slightly brighter than before, more hopeful, and-

"yes."

You're on him in less than a second. 

First, your teeth clumsily collide with his, sending a hot rush of energy through your bones, making your brother whine as he's overwhelmed by the intensity of your shared feelings, then they're everywhere, pressing against his forehead, his cheeks, travelling down his jawline to his neck, and you're struggling to get your words out in-between feverish kisses - "I'M SO PROUD OF YOU" "THIS IS SO GOOD" "I'M SO HAPPY" "I LOVE YOU" "I LOVE YOU" "I LOVE YOU" - and your brother is desperately grasping for something to hold onto, his fingers weaving themselves through your ribs once again, sliding in between them roughly, oh, that's exactly how you like to be touched, and you moan against his clavicles as you're scraping your teeth over them, eliciting a steady stream of little breathless "oh my god"s from him.

You're really not quite sure what you're doing, you just know you need to do more of it. You refuse to leave any part of Sans unkissed. You pull his shirt down to reach his sternum before realising that it'd probably be easier to get it out of the way entirely, barely remembering to wait for his permission before doing so. "SANS, CAN I...?" "huh?" You've left him completely dazed, incapacitated by your relentless attacks, so it takes him a second to realise what you want. "oh... jeez, sure, bro." He seems nervous, but excited, and you're so glad that you're on the same page about this. You remove your own shirt as well, while you're at it, and notice him trying very hard not to stare, as if you would mind, as if you didn't want to be admired. 

You decide to put on a little show for him, to maybe get him to loosen up a little more. You put your hands on his bare shoulders and push him to lie down on the mattress, sitting on his pelvis. His hands come to rest on your thigh bones and you lock eyes with him, more confidently, now, before arching your spine forward, languidly stretching your arms and rolling your neck, running one hand down your ribs, briefly catching on each of them, sighing at the sensation, and you're pretty sure it's doing something for him, his hands sliding up and down your thighs, his eyes fixed on you like you're the only thing in the world that matters, making a tiny, almost pained noise when you wink at him again. Gosh, this feels great. "NYEH HEH HEH!" You take the opportunity to strike a cool pose, flexing your totally-there and totally-impressive biceps, and Sans' expression shifts from barely subdued lust to heartachingly deep affection before he actually giggles a bit, lightly and airily, and it makes you so happy to see and hear that you just have to lean forward to kiss him again.

His hands begin roaming all over your chest as soon as you're within his reach, even bravely gliding along the inside of your ribcage once you give him an encouraging look. You have to stop kissing him to prop yourself up on your elbows and shudder, reveling in the sensation, letting out a long, deliberate moan when he pushes hard against several of the spots where your ribs attach to your spine with one hand and runs the other up and down on the back of your sternum. He looks pretty worked up about it, his mouth falling open as he exhales shakily, and...

...Pushes his pelvis up against yours. You make a choked sound, eyes going comically wide, and he immediately looks like he regrets it, starting to apologise, but the words die in his throat when you grind back down against him.   
"hah..."   
He's closing his eyes tightly, arm coming up to cover them, and you begin experimentally rolling your hips against his in slow circles, arms shaking, barely able to keep yourself from collapsing on top of him. "SANS..." "oh, god, papyrus..."

You manage to bring one of your hands up to his cheek and kiss him while he brings one of his to the back of your skull to reciprocate, and it goes well until you grind against him a bit more harshly than anticipated and the both of you open your mouths to moan at the same time, ending up with your brother accidentally biting your jaw, and not in the sexy way, either. "ACK! SANS!" He looks mortified. You pull back and run a finger across your chin to feel a slight, temporary indentation left by his teeth. "I KNOW I PROBABLY LOOK GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT RIGHT NOW, BUT..." 

You trail off, interrupted by your brother's voice, and he's... laughing? He's... actually, genuinely laughing, his ribcage shaking, his whole face lit up with mirth, his eyes screwed shut, looking about as happy as they get. You... You haven't heard that sound in years. You go completely silent, treasuring every second of it, and in that moment you couldn't possibly be more certain that both of you made the right decision. 

"bro, oh my god, i'm so sorry, that was just, ha..." He looks up at you, and you know you must have an incredibly bittersweet expression on your face right now, full of relief, but also so emotional that there are tears collecting at the corners of your eyes, and you quickly wipe them away, but of course he still notices. "huh? oh, no, did that actually hurt? are you okay?" You nod quickly. "I'VE NEVER BEEN BETTER, SANS!" He's still smiling back at you, a bit hesitantly, but sweetly, and reaches his arms around your neck. "well then. c'mere."

You're peppering soft kisses all over each other's faces, and the delicious heat that had collected in your pelvis spreads throughout your entire body, feeling comforting and exciting all at once. You finally make your way down your brother's chest, paying attention to every spot you can reach, kissing each rib while running your hands along his spine, making him sigh and shiver, and as you get lower and lower, you get increasingly more sure that you're ready to take this all the way.

You rub Sans' hips through the fabric of his shorts. He gives you a nod and, amusingly, a thumbs up before you can even ask for permission, so you quickly pull them all the way off his legs, and that's it, he's laying completely bare before you. He only seems to realise this now, propping himself up on his elbows and looking a bit sheepish about being exposed like this. You shimmy out of your own pants soon enough, your soul pulsing, full of anticipation, and lean forward over him, gently pushing him back down with one hand on his chest, putting your forehead up against his and glancing down at your pubis hovering just above your brother's. Just the sight of it is enough to make you want to moan.

"SANS... IS THIS OKAY?"  
He inhales deeply. Exhales.  
"yeah, it is."  
A wink.  
"go for it."

You don't waste any more time. You push your pubis against his, hard, and, agonisingly slowly, drag your hips forward. You suck in a shaky breath, the sensation totally different from when you'd do this kind of thing by yourself, the magic in your and Sans' bones humming and resonating. You move your hips backwards quickly before, again, slowly sliding forward, the texture of your most sensitive spots just smooth enough for it to be easy and just rough enough to create this amazing friction between your bodies...

"fffuuuhhh... hah... yeah, that's... that's just fine..."

You repeat the motion, falling into an unsteady rhythm, riding waves of pleasure that seem to come and ebb away again rather than steadily building. Sans hooks his legs over your hips, his fingers tangled in your ribcage, his mouth now constantly hanging open.

"oh my god, ah, bro, please, keep going, please, please..."  
"NNNGH... SANS..."

You increase your pace, firmly grabbing one of Sans' hipbones, which causes him to yelp, but you only have time to shoot him an apologetic look before you just, need to push him down into the mattress harder, faster, straining with the effort but determined to reach completion like this. You start throwing your hips back a little after every thrust so you come back down on him especially harshly, wringing a desperate moan from him each time and it's so good, oh god, it's so good, you can feel your magic building up all throughout your body...

"S-SANS! BROTHER, I'M, AH!"  
"yeah, come on, just, hah, just, give into it, it's, mmm, it's okay..."

You're shaken to your very core as you reach your peak, weakly grinding down a few more times before you can't hold yourself up anymore and collapse right on top of your brother, bare chest to bare chest, arms above your head. You vaguely realise that Sans has taken both of your hands in his own, squeezing them tightly as the last of the aftershocks run through you, and then you can't do anything but lie there for several minutes, feeling completely spent and peaceful.

You could've easily fallen asleep like this, but, at the brink of losing consciousness, you suddenly have a horrible realisation. You get off of your brother, kneeling next to him, and gently shake him by the shoulder. "SANS! ARE YOU AWAKE???" He raises his eyelids ever so slightly. "ugh. i am now. what is it?" "DID YOU... YOU KNOW, DID YOU EVEN..." He raises an eyebrow at you. "did i... what?" "YOU KNOW! ...FINISH!" "ah. i, uh, guess not." Oh gosh, you can't believe how selfish you've been, how caught up in your own pleasure... 

"don't worry about it, though." He yawns. "it's fine. i enjoyed myself." "IT MOST DEFINITELY ISN'T FINE! IT'S HORRIBLY UNFAIR! COME HERE, SANS!" You offer him your outstretched arms. "seriously, you don't gotta do anything. i'm super tired at this point, anyhow." You offer them to him more aggressively. "BUT I WANT TO! PLEASE! I REALLY WANT TO... HELP YOU OUT, BROTHER." He sighs in resignation, and you know you've already won. "I WANT TO KNOW WHAT I... DID WRONG? OR COULD DO BETTER..." He plants himself in your lap with his back to you, still naked, and yawns again. "i really don't think it's you, bro. if anything, it's me. i kinda, uh, have trouble with this stuff on my own. it's... not easy to relax." Just a day ago, you might have scoffed at hearing him say that he has trouble relaxing, of all things, but now, you think you understand what he means. You hum thoughtfully.

If you had to guess, you'd say that, despite all that's happened, he's still pretty tense, still not at peace with himself and what he wants, subconsciously blocking off the flow of his own magic, preventing himself from tipping over the edge. Eradicating the root cause of this problem would most likely take years, but for now...

You get to work immediately, firmly pushing two fingers against the front of his pubis, your thumb rubbing along the back. He huffs, bucking into your hand, spreading his legs apart, tightly holding on to your thighs, and you just keep steadily stimulating him while lovingly caressing the front of his ribcage, kissing a path from one shoulder to the other, doing whatever you can to make him feel comfortable and safe and wanted, the way he's made you feel so many times before. Once his breathing speeds up significantly, each exhale threatening to turn into a moan, you move your other hand down to his pelvis, too, grabbing his coccyx, and, oh, that seems to do the trick. Your hand travels up and down, rubbing at the tip, fingering the holes, all the while never letting up on his pubis, and he's loving it, openly panting, asking for more, please, completely giving himself up to you.

But it's still not enough. You keep going, whispering soft encouragements to him, trying very hard to keep your voice low for once. "You're so beautiful, Sans." "hah-" "You make me feel so good. Not just like this, every day. Just by being there." "mmm, i-" "Shhh. Just relax into it." "i-" "You can do it. Come on. For me." "oh god, papyrus, i..." "Shh, shh, I've got you..." You can barely believe it, Sans is actually whimpering, pitiful, pained little noises, his whole body is being wracked by violent shivers, you can practically feel his magic tensing up inside him... He slides down lower in your lap and looks up at you, pawing at your face, failing to cup it properly since he's reaching upwards. He inhales sharply, as if something just burned him, and then he looks you straight in the eyes. "i... i love you... i love you so much, papyrus..." You feel a giddy warmth bubbling up in your chest at hearing him say that, in the throes of ecstasy no less, and you bend down to kiss the top of his head. "I love you too, Sans. I really, truly do." And then, suddenly, a loud sob is pulled from him, mouth remaining open in a silent scream as you hold him through wave after wave of his climax.

You're both exhausted beyond words, too tired to even get under the blankets, and you curl up around your brother where you lie, falling asleep instantly.

You'd hoped to wake up the next morning feeling comfortable and refreshed, pressing a kiss to Sans' neck, possibly even making him breakfast in bed before accompanying him to his station and talking about your future together, but that's really not what happens.

Instead, you wake up with several vertebrae painfully out of place, exhaustion still weighing down your bones, your brother's arm flung across your face, and, most importantly, the dawning realisation that you are already an hour late for your patrol, and only a day after asking Undyne to promote you, no less! You had even indirectly kept Sans from getting to his station on time! That was not your job! That was the exact opposite of your job! If a human had happened to come by during your absence, all would be lost!

"SANS! GET UP, LAZYBONES! IT'S URGENT!" He groans and grumbles for a while, trying to hold on to you. "OH, COME ON, SANS, WERE EIGHT STRAIGHT HOURS OF CUDDLING NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU?" There's a mischievous edge to his grin as he answers. "there was nothing straight about those hours, bro." It takes you a second. "WH- SANS! I SWEAR, IF YOU DON'T CUT THAT OUT, I'M DISOWNING *AND* BREAKING UP WITH YOU!" You storm off to get dressed and get going, his chuckles ringing behind you, and just as you're about to head out the door - You stomp back upstairs, pick your brother up off the bed, kiss him goodbye, put him back down and tell him to get his bony butt to his sentry station, pronto, all the while making an effort to look much more cross about the delay than you actually are.

You have a feeling... things are gonna work out just fine.


	2. Chapter 2

You don't know how long you've been lying here. As soon as you came home to an empty house, the giddy excitement that had, surprisingly, kept you awake and alert all day finally wore off and you crashed hard, mind going fuzzy, numbness settling over you like a heavy blanket, seconds dragging on like hours and hours passing in the blink of an eye. You haven't felt this intensely unreal in a while. 

Probably because there was simply no way that any of this, anything that happened last night, could be real. At the very least, it wouldn't be real for long.

Or maybe you're just tired. Who knows.

You curl in on yourself slightly, eyes fixed on a spot outside your window, seeing nothing. Papyrus is probably coming home late to make up for missing a whole hour of his shift this morning. You, of course, hadn't stayed at any of your jobs for even a second longer than you had to, giving you ample time to mope around all by yourself in your room. It's just as well. You don't want him to see you like this. He'd probably think it's his fault somehow, or something he can fix-

Your door is flung open with enough force to leave a dent in the wall. You sit up abruptly, startled into fight or flight mode.

"SANS!!!"

You don't even have time to relax before your brother is bounding towards you, taking a running leap at the mattress, picking up enough speed to cause it to slide all the way into the corner of your room upon impact. It collides with the back wall with an "oof" and a "NYEH", Papyrus throwing his arms around your neck as the shock causes you to fall backwards and him to end up lying on top of you, his head on your chest.

"I'M HOME!"  
You weakly raise a hand to pat him on the back.  
"you sure are."  
"NYEH HEH HEH..."  
"that was a pretty good entrance, bro. solid nine outta ten, i'd say."  
He looks up at you, chin resting on your sternum, no less full of enthusiasm than he was yesterday. You almost envy him.  
"AND I THINK I KNOW JUST HOW TO EARN THAT FINAL POINT!"  
He pushes himself up and forwards until his face is right above yours, faltering for a second when he takes in your expression. It'd seem fine to most people, but you know he can tell how hollow your smile really is. You look back at him, eyes unfocused, fearing that he might ask you what's wrong and you wouldn't be able to tell him, wouldn't even know where to start, but he doesn't. He just smiles - reassuringly? sadly? - as he slowly closes the gap between your mouths.

It feels like... It feels like your soul sliding into place with a satisfying click, like it had been hanging ever so slightly off-center all this time and you hadn't even realised it until you got to experience how right it could feel. You let out a long sigh, willing yourself to relax into the kiss, slow and steady and careful, wrapping your arms around your brother to pull him closer, ribs sliding against each other in a way that makes both of you shudder. Your mind goes blissfully blank for a while, focused on nothing but the pleasant hum of magic being shared and exchanged between your bodies. How had you ever gotten by without this?

Sadly enough, it doesn't last forever.  
"WELL?"  
"i dunno, bro. that was nice and all, but it can't really be considered part of your entrance anymore."  
His brows furrow as he hums thoughtfully, stroking his chin, seriously considering what his next move should be to achieve the perfect score on the completely nonsensical scale you'd just made up. He's always so eager to please. It's ridiculously cute.   
"changing someone's rating after i've already given it would be... just plain unfair."  
"ARE YOU SURE YOU CAN'T MAKE AN EXCEPTION FOR ME?"  
His teeth return to your mouth, briefly, then they're running along the side of your jaw, lingering at the surprisingly sensitive spot where your mandible attaches to your skull.  
"what- are you trying to bribe the judge? with kisses?"  
He looks at you, playful, almost smug.  
"IS IT WORKING???"  
"scandalous. i've got a great deal of integrity, you know. evaluating people's dramatic entrances is serious business."  
"AW..."  
You wink at him.  
"but, for what it's worth, that was still the highest rating i've ever given to anyone. even if it fell just short of flawless."   
"WOWIE! ALRIGHT, THEN, I'LL ACCEPT IT!"  
He bumps your foreheads together, giggling, before pulling you onto your side and lying down to face you, one hand holding up his head, the other running up and down your arm.  
"I SUPPOSE I'LL JUST HAVE TO TRY EVEN HARDER NEXT TIME! I'M GOING TO ABSOLUTELY SWEEP YOU OFF YOUR FEET, SANS!"

You smile back at him, making an effort to keep it light. Keep it together. Don't force him to suffer along with you.

There's only about thirty centimeters of distance between you, but it still feels like far too much. Your chest is aching something awful. Your eyes are glazing over, looking straight through him. 

You have so much to lose. 

You wonder how much longer you'll get to stay in this timeline.   
You wonder how many memories you've already lost to stretches of time suddenly folding in on themselves, the only signs that they'd ever existed locked away in the deepest depths of your subconscious, the emotional baggage of dozens of unlived lifetimes weighing you down. You wonder how many times you've already been here, in this exact position, thinking the exact same thing, and how many times you won't even make it here, your current bond painfully absent, your brother dead, you dead, everyone dead. You wonder if any trace of this moment will remain, come back to haunt you in the form of dreams and moments of dejá vu once it's been inevitably erased from your mind, from reality itself, you wonder how you're supposed to cope with the constant dread, with knowing that none of this can last, you wonder how anything could be worth the effort and the anxiety when you know, you know it's all so utterly pointless...

Papyrus' mouth is moving. He looks... distressed. You must have been so lost in thought that you hadn't heard him speak.

"...ABOUT THIS, RIGHT? ABOUT US? I KNOW YOU'RE PROBABLY STILL WORRIED, BUT-"  
"i'm fine, bro. just zoned out for a second there. sorry."

There's a horribly desperate look in his eyes, like he's watching something precious and irreplacable slipping away from him while he's unable to stop or reach out to it, and that's your fault, isn't it? You've already messed up. Already made him unhappy. He brings nothing but joy into your life and you're only ever dragging him down-

Suddenly, Papyrus' arm is around your shoulders, pulling you towards himself, bridging the small distance that had, for some reason, felt like an uncrossable canyon keeping you apart. Something inside you shatters. 

Without even thinking about it, you cling to him, so tightly and urgently that it simply has to be uncomfortable, gripping the back of his shirt and burying your face in it as much as you can. The steady pressure on your chest brings you some relief, grounding you, and you wrap one of your legs around his waist, the other getting tangled up between his.

Your breathing had been shallow and unsteady, but now you have no choice but to match it to your brother's, arms encircling each other so firmly that there's no room for your ribcages to do anything but rise and descend in perfect synch, deeply, slowly, calming you down without even saying a word.

Every shared breath takes you a step further away from your earlier state of mind, all those worries seeming increasingly abstract and meaningless, the present moment beginning to feel like the only thing that truly matters.

Inhale.  
Your brother loves you, just as much as you love him.

Exhale.  
He wants you to be happy. He wants to take care of you.

Inhale.  
You are not a burden. His- Many people's lives would be significantly worse without you.

Exhale.  
Even under normal circumstances, nothing can ever be permanent, anyway. 

Inhale.  
That's precisely why you should hold on to every shred of happiness you can get.

Exhale.  
You'll find each other again. Your feelings are a constant, regardless of the circumstances, regardless of the point in time.

Even if all this is ripped from you... You'll just build it back up again. Sooner or later, you'll get another chance. You won't even notice. This may well be your twenty-second attempt, and it isn't any less real for it.

You slightly loosen the death grip you had on him. He does the same, one of his hands coming up to gently stroke your skull.

For now, you are at peace.

"FEELING BETTER?"  
"yeah."  
You relax against him. God, you're so tired.  
"thanks, bro. you really are... just the coolest."  
"YOU'RE PRETTY COOL YOURSELF, SANS! I JUST WISH YOU WOULDN'T DOUBT IT SO MUCH."  
Your eyes fall closed.  
"DON'T WORRY, THOUGH! I'LL ALWAYS BE HERE TO REASSURE YOU OF THAT FACT. AND ONE DAY, YOU'LL START BELIEVING IT, TOO, EVEN WITHOUT ME TELLING YOU."  
His voice sounds so far off.  
"THAT'S HOW IT WAS FOR ME, AT LEAST."

The last conscious thought you have before you fall asleep...

"...OH MY GOD, SANS, WE HAVE TO RELOCATE, RIGHT NOW, IMMEDIATELY, I JUST NOTICED HOW GROSS YOUR MATTRESS IS, THERE AREN'T EVEN ANY BEDSHEETS- SANS! SANS, ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASLEEP ALREADY???"

You wonder what the future holds.

\---

You expand your evening ritual to include napping together for two, sometimes even three hours- Papyrus doesn't always manage to calm down enough to actually fall asleep, but you can at least get him to try and relax for a while. Even if he doesn't need it to stay physically fit, going days at a time without getting any rest can't be healthy.

Regardless of whether he's snoozing along with you or not, he just can't seem to manage to stay still, constantly squirming around, even turning over without letting go of you, essentially treating you like a giant teddy bear. Most people probably wouldn't approve of being manhandled like that, but you don't really mind waking up every thirty minutes to find yourself in a completely different position than you last remember being in.

After all, if there's anything you're good at, it's falling asleep in record time, the disturbance rarely keeping you up for more than a minute. And, well. As cheesy as it sounds, waking up in your brother's arms is never a bad thing. You actually grow to treasure those moments, sleepily blinking up at him, feeling incredibly cozy, wrapped up in your shared blanket, occasionally placing slow, clumsy kisses wherever you can reach as you drift off again.

One night, you wake up without having been flipped over, accidentally elbowed in the face or squished against the edge of the bed first, only to be faced with that most elusive of sights: a peacefully sleeping Papyrus. You're pretty sure it's way past your usual allotted nap time, and at some point during the night he must have pulled you on top of him. One of his legs is awkwardly bent towards him, the other flung over the bedframe, and one of his arms is spread out above his head, the other placed directly on your back, underneath your shirt. His fingers are twitching slightly, periodically curling around your ribs, and he's snoring softly, letting out a tiny "nyeh" on every exhale, his face completely free of any kind of tension or worry, and it's honestly so precious you kind of want to cry.

You don't, of course. You couldn't bear to wake him. You just sigh, softly, and quietly reflect on how unbelievably lucky you are.

You keep your seperate rooms, but the additional time spent in each other's living spaces does lead to both of them changing subtly, accommodating the other's presence. You get some proper bedsheets and a fluffy blanket, for one, your brother straight-up refusing to ever come near your bed again otherwise. You even let him wash them when he deems it necessary, but you fight for your right to keep the trash tornado. You can't sleep without its steady whirring ringing in your non-existent ears, you say. You could probably sleep next to a trash compactor, he says. Interesting hypothesis, you say. Then maybe it's just the proximity to garbage that really makes you feel at home, not specifically the sweet lullaby that is the background noise generated by your junk-based perpetuum mobile. He can't think of anything to say to that.

Meanwhile, the rogue sock or... other article of clothing ends up on your brother's floor. At first he complains, but eventually he grows so used to it that he'll even leave the house without picking them up if he's in a hurry. Sometimes you do it for him, just to see the unreasonably proud look on his face when he notices. On one occasion, you even catch yourself absent-mindedly picking up The Sock, the one in the living room, with every intention of putting it in the laundry basket, and quickly put it back where it belongs, utterly mortified. Love really does change a man.

Papyrus expands your morning ritual to include you in his daily warm-up jog through the woods- Well, not quite, he cannot and will not ever get you to actually go jogging with him, he can do that kind of stuff with Undyne, but afterwards he comes home to pick you up for a quick walk before you have to start working. As soon as the village is out of sight, you're faced with a horrible inner conflict, the urge to hold his hand competing with the urge to not be dragged around at a pace that could unironically be described as "brisk", but the former always wins in the end. He thinks that, even if you don't need it to keep up your good spirits, going days at a time without moving any significant amount can't be healthy.

If you grow particularly tired, he'll take pity on you and carry you back, like he always has, except now you don't have to feel awkward when your teeth brush against his neck or your hands linger on his collarbones, don't have to resist the temptation to lean forward and nuzzle your cheek against his, don't have to carefully time your "i love you"s so they don't seem suspicious or inappropriate, instead simply letting them spill forth whenever it feels right.

You've both changed, subtly, slowly, the difference only becoming obvious now that you're looking back on how you used to be, but you think... You think it was for the better.

\---

You talk a lot. 

Sometimes you talk about the surface.

First, about all the things you'll see and do if you ever get there, Papyrus seeming utterly convinced that he will. 

Then, about all the ways the imaginary world you'd built in your heads pales in comparison to the real thing.

It's not all sunshine and rainbows, of course. Human-Monster relations are strained, the local government uncertain if and how they should break the news of your existence and freedom to the rest of the world, but you don't let yourself get locked away again. Your ambassador makes sure of it.

Well, there's also the threat of a global political scandal or even another war if they tried and inevitably failed to keep you a secret, but, still, you like to think the kid's inexplicable charisma had something to do with it.

The wide open spaces are... overwhelming, honestly. Every time you look at the sky, you remind yourself that you're looking off into infinity, seeing objects at such utterly unfathomable distances that it takes their light years and years to reach your eyes, and you sway a little where you stand, feeling dizzy.

You don't even want to think about the scale of the world itself, all the places you could go, all the people you could meet, not yet, you want to take it slow and just get used to the patch of land surrounding MT. Ebott, first. You want to take in every detail in every tree, every unfamiliar flower, every blade of grass, spend a few days just cloud-watching, spend a few nights huddling up to your bro and pointing out all the constellations that you'd only ever read and dreamed about before.

Eventually, the humans will try to find each of you a place to work or get educated at, integrating you into society, but for now you can quite comfortably live off of your savings - turns out, stashes of gold are much more valuable on the surface, human squads currently turning the underground upside down looking for the source of your riches - and take some time to get acclimated to your new surroundings. You're pretty grateful for that. You'd hate for everything to reset when all you'd really gotten to see of the surface was a bunch of humans sweating bullets as they try to act casual about having a job interview with a skeleton. Better to enjoy yourself while you can. Make the most of it, as you'd promised yourself you would... without losing sight of the future, ideally. The more time passes without a reset, the less uncertain it seems.

You end up moving into a two-bedroom apartment with Undyne and Alphys. You don't want to blow through your savings too quickly, and are already used to living with the uncharacteristically hot-blooded fish lady, anyway, so it just seems like the obvious thing to do. Her and Papyrus are positively delighted to be spending most of their time within screaming distance of each other, and reconnecting with Alphys isn't nearly as awkward as you thought it'd be.

Well, it definitely is awkward, but that's more due to Alphys being an anxious, nerdy little lizard, and less due to your shared past, which is what you'd been afraid of. She seems to have made her peace with it, for the most part.

However... As fun as living so close to your friends is, it does have its downsides. Watching those two act like this trip to the surface is basically just their super dreamy extended honeymoon... It makes you realise you've got an important decision to make. Not one you can make alone, either.

You are, in fact, currently mulling it over, wondering how to approach the subject. You're in your new room, on Papyrus' new, sadly not racecar-shaped bed, and he's spooning you while playing a Professor Layton game, occasionally asking for your input, breezing through some puzzles at astonishing speeds and getting stuck on others for entirely unreasonable amounts of time. You do your best to walk him through them in a way that'll still let him feel like he's the one who figured it out.

"so, papyrus..."  
"NOT NOW, I'M TRYING TO CONCENTRATE."  
What puzzle is he working on? ...Hm. It's one of those where you have to connect several points on a grid to each other without letting any of the connecting lines overlap. Those are pretty tricky.  
"well, if you want my advice, i'd say B has the shortest possible path. and we're pretty big on saving space, here."  
"I'M NOT TRYING TO GET THEM TO THEIR HOUSES, SANS, JEEZ. HAVEN'T YOU EVEN READ THE STORY BEHIND THIS PUZZLE?"  
You hadn't really bothered. The flavour text states that each of the points represents a person's home or place of work. All of the people who live there really hate each other, so they want to avoid each other on their way to work- Ah.  
"bro, are you- you just gotta follow the instructions."  
"WHY SHOULD I??? AVOIDING PEOPLE YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IS TOTALLY COUNTERPRODUCTIVE."  
"well, maybe, but..."  
"I'M TRYING TO MAKE ALL FOUR OF THEM MEET AT AN INTERSECTION! THEN THEY CAN TALK OVER THEIR DIFFERENCES AND BECOME FRIENDS."  
Oh boy. You try very hard not to laugh.  
"not... really? i mean... it's a videogame. it doesn't expect you to read that deeply into it. it's just expecting you to solve the problem presented."  
"BUT I AM!"  
"not like, the characters' personal problems. those are just a backdrop for the, uh, challenge of drawing the lines the right way."  
His brows furrow. He puts the DS away.  
"WHAT A CLOSED-MINDED GAME."  
You wink.  
"yeah, i guess the developers weren't too big on out-of-the-box thinking after all."

This does give you an opportunity to get back to your earlier point, though. You wiggle around until you're facing him.  
"alright, bro, listen. we need to talk."  
He immediately looks guilty.  
"IS THIS ABOUT THE RECENT PRESSURE COOKER EXPLOSION? BECAUSE, I SWEAR THAT WASN'T MY FAULT, OR UNDYNE'S, WE WERE JUST DISTRACTED, SINCE, WELL, SOMEHOW, I SWEAR THAT ANNOYING DOG FOLLOWED US HERE, AND-"  
"it's... not about that. you haven't done anything wrong."  
His features relax, but only slightly.  
"it's about... well, it's about the living situation we've got going on, currently."  
You sigh. Best to just get it over with. You glance at the door to make sure it's shut tight.  
"do you want to... do you think we should let undyne and alphys know that we're together?"

He looks confused.  
"THEY'LL FIGURE IT OUT SOON ENOUGH, WON'T THEY?"  
"no, no, that's... that's exactly what i'm worried about. i was wondering if maybe it'd be better to, you know, not act too suspiciously around them? i know it's a pain, since we're at home and all, but..."  
"..."SUSPICIOUSLY"?"  
Oh, no, you could have worded that better.  
"i just mean, maybe we should avoid acting in a way that'd let them figure it out. maybe we should... keep it to ourselves."  
There's alarm and hurt written all over his face. You already regret bringing this up.  
"WELL, I'M... I'M NOT GOOD AT HIDING THINGS. OR FEELINGS. AND I'M NOT GOOD AT... I DON'T LIKE LYING TO MY FRIENDS, SANS."  
"i'm not saying you'd have to. you'd just have to... not tell them. no actual lying involved, i promise."  
"THAT SOUNDS AN AWFUL LOT LIKE SOMETHING A LIAR WOULD SAY."  
He lets go of you and turns over to lie on his back, staring at the ceiling.   
"I DON'T KNOW, BROTHER. I THINK WE CAN TRUST THEM. THEY WOULDN'T... HURT US, OR HATE US, OR ANYTHING. THEY'RE OUR FRIENDS."  
"of course they are. it's not really a matter of trusting them or not, it's more like, uh..."

You struggle to make your point in a way that doesn't make it seem like you're trying to break his unwavering faith in his friends. It's one of his most admirable, most defining qualities, even if it's bound to get him into trouble someday- Has already gotten him into trouble, really. It's not the result of naivete, of never having been betrayed before, it's a conscious decision he's making, despite knowing what people can be like at their worst. Man. You wish you had the strength to do that. He's so cool.

...What were you talking about, again?  
Ah. Right. Reasons to keep this a secret.

"well, there are more important things in life, you know?"  
He scowls.  
"like... you have hopes, and dreams, and stuff. you've got big plans for your future, right?"  
"NOT REALLY. I'M STILL RECOVERING FROM NEVER MAKING IT INTO THE ROYAL GUARD."  
"ok, but i'm sure you'll eventually find another goal to work towards. and i'm sure it'll be... something great. where you're helping people, and being respected and admired and all that stuff you've always wanted."  
"I GUESS..."  
"yeah, and, well, i used to think the only important thing was your... our present happiness, you know? i used to think it was enough to just, live comfortably, from moment to moment. i didn't care about the future. i didn't even wanna think about it. and if i still had that mindset, i'd definitely be all for us smooching it up in public."  
He's listening intently. You don't think you've ever really talked about this before. You weren't even planning to do it today, but, whelp, dam's broken, no stopping the flood.  
"but now i'm thinking more long-term. and, i'll be honest, the taboo on... this kind of relationship is even worse now than it was underground. if rumors started spreading about us, it'd totally ruin your reputation. your image. it'd greatly reduce your chances of ever being popular, is what i'm saying."  
"SANS..."  
"and that's not what i want for you. that's not really something i even want to risk. so."  
You put your hand on top of his.   
"that's my stance. and your cue to disagree with me, i guess."

He's quiet for a while, looking thoughtful.  
"IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE... IF WE JUST LET OUR FRIENDS KNOW, THAT DOESN'T AUTOMATICALLY MEAN THAT EVERYBODY ELSE WILL, TOO."  
He sounds... hesitant.  
"you're right. but there's a risk. not even of them telling anyone on purpose, just, things slip through, you know? and making them keep our secret would be stressful for them, too."  
With every word out of your mouth, his face falls a little. You hate this.  
"so, in a way, it's for their own good. theirs, and all the people who'll eventually get to look up to you."  
He turns back towards you, curling in on himself.   
"But I'm not... I'm not any less deserving of anyone's admiration... or, or friendship, just because I..."  
His voice is eerily quiet, lacking the confidence that's usually behind everything he says, and, god, he's not supposed to sound like that, hasn't sounded that insecure in ages.  
"of course not. of course not, papyrus, you're the best person i know, even objectively... shh, it's okay, it's okay..."  
He's not actually crying, but you can feel that he's close. He's always cared about others thinking badly of him way more than he lets on. There's no way that the world at large deeming the happiness you've found with each other utterly unacceptable isn't getting to him.

"i'm sorry, bro. i really am."  
You cup his face.  
"let's just see how this works out, ok? if it feels too wrong, we can... we can talk more about it then, alright?"  
He just nods, avoiding your eyes, until, suddenly, he sniffles, takes a deep breath, and pulls his mouth back into its usual cheerful grin, as if nothing had even happened.   
"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE ACTUALLY BEING THE RESPONSIBLE ONE FOR ONCE, SANS!"   
"well, you know me. i always like to keep people guessing."  
He just smiles at you for a while, then he shuffles closer, forehead resting against your shoulder, one hand on your hips. You fall into your usual ritual of reassurance, gently petting his head, sometimes running your fingers down his neck and along his collar bones, and when you glance downwards at his face, you realise he must have let his smile drop as soon as it left your field of vision. You wish you could tell him that he doesn't have to pretend, not around you, but that would make you the biggest hypocrite of the century, so you just keep doing your best to silently soothe him.

For you, all the anxiety about your relationship stems from other people's opinions of it, specifically the effect those might have on Papyrus - There's no internal conflict, there. Not about you being related, at least. You've long since come to terms with being... not normal. With your life being the furthest possible thing from normal. 

It's an existential nightmare, for one. Your former lab partner used to melt people in her basement and recruited you to help keep them fed, for two. You can't remember most of your childhood, for three, and it isn't the usual kind of not-remembering, either, it's like your memories are fragmented, scattered, missing some crucial pieces. Trying to recall them gives you a splitting headache, and you know you're forgetting something important, and every day it slips farther away from you-

Basically, life is messed up enough as it is. Papyrus has been your one constant source of comfort throughout all of it, the one thing keeping you tethered to the present, and you love him in just about every way it's possible to love someone, and if those feelings are at all reciprocated... If you can make him happy by being with him... How could you not?

Still. It'd be close to impossible to explain all of that to the rest of the world. You can't expect anyone to understand. The only thing you can do is not even give them the opportunity to hurt your brother through their ignorance.

"SANS?"  
"yeah, bro?"  
"CAN WE... I KNOW IT'S STILL EARLY, BUT CAN WE TAKE OUR NAP NOW?"  
You chuckle. Neither of you is actually going to sleep right now, "napping" is just code for "cuddling".  
"you know i'd never say no to a good snooze."  
"DO I EVER."  
Your bickering lightens the atmosphere a little, takes you back into familiar territory. Papyrus' hand travels from your hip to the side of your ribcage as he pulls both of them towards himself, sighing deeply when your chest is pressed up against his. He draws his legs upwards to push them against yours, too, rests his head on yours, wraps both his arms around you so they come up around your shoulders... Seems like he's in one of those moods where he feels like he needs to cover as much of your body with his as physically possible. Not that you're complaining. It's not just his body surrounding you, it's his emotions and intentions towards you, too, manifesting as a kind of soft, warm magical aura that seeps into your bones and strengthens your soul. You could stay like this forever.

...Well, no, you can't. You'd be willing to, but as you suddenly register the sound of voices coming from the kitchen, you realise that you won't be able to do this for nearly as long as you'd like. Unless-

"I LOVE YOU, SANS."  
...That came right out of nowhere.  
"uh, yeah, but-"  
Papyrus' whole body ever so slightly tenses up. Oh, no, how far up your mouth could your foot possibly be? If he said that to you, as dismissively as that, during a moment as vulnerable as this, you'd crumble into dust right then and there-  
"i mean, i love you, too, it's just..."  
You can't send him away. There's no way you can deny him the comfort he's craving right now. You won't be responsible for any more of his pain today.  
"listen, it's the middle of the afternoon, and our roomies are home, so i'm just kinda worried..."  
"OH. I SEE. YOU WANT TO START... KEEPING IT TO OURSELVES."  
"no, i mean, yes, but i don't- no, don't leave, i just think, maybe we should lock the door, if we're gonna do this now? so nobody casually waltzes in here and sees us all... tangled up."  
You nuzzle him almost aggressively.  
"i do wanna tangle, but..."  
Your backpedalling is interrupted by a short chuckle, and, wow, that feels really good to hear right now.  
"ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, CALM DOWN. IT'S FINE. I'LL JUST..."

He rolls off the bed, all the while firmly holding on to you, and, wow, he really doesn't want to let go. He actually carries you the ten feet to the door, your legs wrapped around him, his face buried in your soft hoodie. Two more strides and he's removing the arm around your back, instead pushing you up against the door, forehead to forehead, as he reaches over to turn the key. He hesitates for a moment, looking like he wants to say something, but then his face falls and he locks the door with a noise that sounds oddly... final. That's that, then. Secret kept.

He sighs as his head rests against the door, and he's pretty much just holding you up by leaning against you, now. Gravity seems to be the last thing he's currently concerned with.  
"papyrus? i'm... really glad you did that. takes a burden off my mind."  
He snaps to attention, carefully gathering you up in his arms again as he returns to the bed.  
"OF COURSE."  
He gets under the covers with you, lying on his back.  
"IT'S FOR THE BEST, REALLY."  
He still seems kind of out of it. You decide to... say something. Something you've been holding out on for a while, that might just turn this situation around. Either that, or it turns out your head is crammed up your own pelvis in addition to your foot being in your mouth, and you just can't even tell what's inappropriate to say and what isn't anymore.

"listen, papyrus, you're, uh..."  
Oh, man, he'll probably think this is totally weird. He'll realise how cringeworthy it sounds and take it as further evidence that you're really... No, no, you stay resolute.   
"i just wanted to say..."  
He's looking up at you, nervously, like he expects you to dial your relationship down even further, or maybe like he knows you're trying to do the opposite...  
"wellll, i really think you're..."  
Oh, man, this isn't like you at all. You don't do "flustered". You're not this much of an overthinker. You're cool, laid-back Sans the Skeleton, you're chill about everything, about everything but this...

You'll take the plunge. It may very well be into lava, but you won't back down now. You take a deep breath.  
"despite all these... limitations. and what other people might have to say about us. i really think..."  
You wink at him. It comes off as far more forced than usual.  
"you're really the best boyfriend a guy can have. still."  
You squeeze your eyes shut. That was downright painful. You should... really leave this kind of stuff to Papyrus. Once a few seconds have passed and the earth hasn't swallowed you whole, you dare open your eyes, and your brother is... Oh, wow. His eyes are literally sparkling. Relief runs through you, taking the nervous edge off your grin, returning you to your regular persona.

"W-WOWIE... SANS, YOU CALLED ME YOUR..."   
An adorable little squeak escapes him.   
"it's true, isn't it? we've been together for a while."  
"YES, BUT... I'M YOUR BOYFRIEND... NOT JUST THAT, BUT I'M THE BEST ONE YOU COULD HAVE?"  
He squeezes you tightly.  
"YOU'RE MY BOYFRIEND, SANS!"  
You chuckle. His enthusiasm is as contagious as ever.  
"WE'VE NEVER ACTUALLY SAID THAT BEFORE? FOR SOME REASON, THAT WORD ALWAYS FELT... OFF-LIMITS TO ME. YOU WOULDN'T SAY IT, SO..."  
You're so glad to see his smile reach his eyes again. If you'd known it would make him this happy, you wouldn't have wasted a single second feeling awkward about it.

"i was just being a dork about it, bro, don't worry. the word's fine. unless you think "brofriend" would be more appropriate."  
His eyes widen.  
"y'know, like, a silly portmanteau, 'cause we're bros, and we're boyfriends..."  
Tiny sparks of light materialise in them, his hands come up to cover his mouth, and, jeez, he's so precious when he's flustered. He's precious all the time, but-  
"OH MY GOD."  
Without any warning, he grabs you and switches your positions, half-lying on top of you, his hips sideways next to yours and his legs drawn up towards you, one hand on your chest.  
"SANS, OH MY GOD, THAT'S SO CUTE!"  
He gives you a little kiss.   
"I LOVE IT!"  
And another.  
"I LOVE YOU!"  
The kisses won't stop, and you can't help giggling a little as Papyrus repeatedly smushes your faces together.  
"WE'RE BEST FRIENDS, TOO, SO REALLY, IT WORKS IN A LOT OF WAYS!"  
You wink at him. It comes easily, this time.  
"i guess that makes us... best brofriends forever?"  
"SANS..."  
You can't resist, you just have to pull him down for a longer, deeper kiss, soul full of joy and affection and only the vaguest echoes of uncertainty and shame, and, god, you're so in love.

You feel... oddly hopeful. Optimistic, almost. You promised each other you'd work through your problems, and you're more certain than ever that this really is worth any amount of trouble you might face. You can make it through anything, together, and maybe, one day, you won't have to...

No, no, you shouldn't daydream like that - Even if your last ridiculous fantasy actually came true when you broke through the barrier with all your friends alive and you brother's hand in yours.

Things are fine as they are.

Everything will be okay.

\---

You'd gotten so used to all-day-round casual touches and gestures that clearly went beyond regular brotherly affection that remembering to keep your hands to yourselves around others is fairly stressful. There's always that moment of temptation to curl up in Papyrus' lap while you're watching TV, or wipe the spaghetti sauce off his mouth when you're having dinner, or welcome him home with your arms outstretched so he'll pick you up and give you a smooch, and it just... wouldn't be appropriate to act on it. You're uncomfortably reminded of how things used to be.

Papyrus struggles with it even more than you do, frequently initiating public displays of affection only to awkwardly trail off when he realises his mistake. A planned embrace becomes a pat on the back, a flirty wink turns into something getting caught in his eye, and the phrase "I LOVE" has been followed by yoghurt, yachts, and yodelling, none of which are particularly in-character for him. It's... pretty suspicious, honestly. Sometimes he does it around Undyne, and you swear you can see her glaring daggers at you out of the corner of your eye, seemingly suspecting that something's amiss and very much disapproving of it, which is quite the unpleasant surprise. You definitely would have expected her to be more invested in his happiness than the upholding of any social norms, so you're not sure what's going on, there- One more reason to keep them from finding out.

You do have the privacy of your bedroom, still. You seriously hope nobody ever starts wondering why a pair of siblings, just hanging out, would so frequently insist on keeping their door locked.

You've got a couple of excuses up your sleeve if worst comes to worst - Your favourite is "we're trying to recreate my precious self-sustaining trash tornado, even the slightest breeze coming in through an opened door would cause it to collapse and all our careful calculations to have been for nothing" - but things could still get really awkward, really quickly.

So, of course you jump at the chance to have the whole place to yourselves whenever you can. Undyne and Alphys just invited you to go see some anime movie that's apparently a big enough deal to be screened overseas, but Papyrus doesn't really care for that sort of thing, and there's nothing you care about more than spending time with him, so you decide to stay home and make the most of your three hours of total freedom.

You think you know just how to pass the time.

You lean against the doorframe with your elbow, one hand on your hip, blocking your brother from passing through - So long as he doesn't elect to simply pick you up and move you out of the way, that is.   
"y'know, papyrus, i'm really feeling the idea of a nice, relaxing bath right now..."  
"WHAT- NOW, OF ALL TIMES? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MORE EFFICIENT SHOWERS ARE?"  
You slowly unzip your hoodie, grinning up at him.  
"problem is, i feel like the tub might be too big for me..."  
"ANOTHER POINT IN FAVOUR OF THE SHOWER. HONESTLY, SANS, YOU'RE BOUND TO DROWN IN THERE. OR MAYBE FLOAT? HOW HIGH IS OUR BONE DENSITY AGAIN?"  
You can barely hold in your laughter, turning your back to the doorframe, propping one foot up against it, carding your fingers through your entirely imaginary hair.  
"i think it might be too big for just me. for any one person, really."  
"WELL, THAT'S JUST NOT TRUE. IF ANYTHING, IT'S TOO SMALL FOR ME AND UNDYNE. IT MUST GET REALLY CRAMPED IN THERE WHEN SHE TAKES ALPHYS ALONG."  
You try waggling your eyebrows at him.  
"maybe somebody could keep me company, too? maybe even..."  
You put one finger to where you imagine the lips of someone with skin might be.  
"...hold me in their big, strong arms so i don't... drown or float away or whatever."  
You can't help it, you're cracking up.  
"WELL, IT WON'T BE ME, SANS, I'D SINK JUST AS MUCH OR AS LITTLE AS YOU. HONESTLY, YOU SHOULD KNOW SIZE DOESN'T MATTER IF DENSITY IS THE SAME, I THOUGHT YOU LIKED PHYSICS AND WAIT A MINUTE ARE YOU COMING ON TO ME?"  
You give him a wink.  
"got it in one."  
"OH MY GOD, THEN WHY ARE YOU WASTING TIME STANDING AROUND IN RIDICULOUS POSES???"  
He looks more than a little offended at your half-hearted attempt at seducing him, but it just makes you giggle even more.

Only a moment passes before you're being swept up in his arms, the ground giving out beneath your feet so suddenly that you instinctively cling to him, resting your head against his shoulder as he carries you into the bathroom bridal style.   
"YOU KNOW YOU ONLY HAVE TO ASK. ESPECIALLY WHEN WE'RE ALONE!"  
"i know, bro. i just wanted to tease you a little."  
You end up sideways in his lap when he sits down on the edge of the bathtub, reaching behind himself to turn on the hot water and add a bit of Undyne's seaweed-scented bubble bath to it.  
"ARE YOU SURE THAT'S A GOOD IDEA?"  
He bumps your foreheads together, one arm still supporting your back, his other hand coming up to your bare chest.  
"I MAY BE TEMPTED TO RETALIATE."  
He winks at you - a habit he's picked up from you, that, in your humble opinion, looks much better on him - then spreads his fingers to softly run them along your ribs, palm pushing against your sternum.  
"heh... i was kinda hoping you would, actually."  
You're not sure if he can hear you over the sound of the rushing water, but he can definitely see you winking back at him. His only response is an amused hum as he kisses your temple, increasing the pressure on your ribs, maddeningly slowly dragging his fingertips across the edges. You gasp softly whenever he brushes against their sensitive underside, but he never follows through, always pulling his hand back the tiniest bit while looking rather proud of his ability to make you squirm. He certainly is making good on his threat.

Your fingers find his spine underneath his shirt, rubbing the soft discs between the vertebrae in hopes of egging him on. He shudders- You can't immediately tell if it's with pleasure or discomfort, that area isn't exactly a guaranteed winner, and you recoil as if you'd been burned by him, looking apologetic. He seems more confused than anything, looking from your hand to your face and back again, which in turn makes you feel embarrassed for overreacting, an awkward atmosphere coming over you until understanding dawns on his face and he "nyeh heh heh"s softly. You're just about to say something when he takes his shirt off, smiling brightly, and covers one of your hands with his, guiding it back to his spine. You chuckle, a bit nervously, as he presses your thumb into it much harder than you would've dared, arching his spine towards you, encouraging you to really dig your fingers into it, breathing harshly. Oh man. 

You feel much more confident now, holding on to him as you move one leg over so you're sitting face-to-face - your feet hang into the water, you'll have to get up before it reaches your shorts - so you can massage his spine with both of your hands, the bit of give to the cartilage feeling amazing underneath your fingers, moving lower and lower, wringing plenty of those subdued little noises you've grown to love so much out of him, one of his hands covering his mouth and the other squeezing your shoulder. You lean in close.  
"it's okay to- to get a little louder. if you want to. we're home alone, remember?"  
One of your hands finally makes it all the way down to his sacrum, and you drag your fingers from one hole to the other just as harshly as you'd been moving against his spine. He inhales sharply, the hand on your shoulder tightening its grip so much it's almost painful, and you're practically shaking with want, just from watching him come undone.  
"don't- don't start screaming my name or anything, 'cause we do still have neighbours, but-"

You're cut off by a long, desperate moan that sends a rush of heat through your body, the noise soon muffled by your own teeth, and you're not sure who started kissing who, but one of his arms is pulling you close and the other is finally, finally paying attention to the inside of your ribcage, movements shaky, but satisfying, and you whine against his mouth, needing more, pushing closer and closer and-

The both of you go tumbling over the edge of the bathtub.

In retrospect, this outcome was entirely predictable.

Turns out magical skeletons do sink after all, just very, very slowly. You spend no more than three seconds underwater before Papyrus is sitting up and pulling you with him, blindly reaching for the tap as he turns his head left and right to get the water out of his skull.  
"UGH, SANS, ARE YOU-"  
You don't have the benefit of two large holes in your cheeks, so it's taking the water a while longer to leave your head. You open your mouth to drain it more quickly, giving an incredibly unenthusiastic thumbs up to reassure him that you'll be fine, and it's got to look pretty ridiculous, your brother covering his mouth to avoid letting you hear how your misery amuses him.  
"WELL, TO BE FAIR, THAT WAS PRETTY MUCH ENTIRELY YOUR OWN FAULT."  
"don't you act like you couldn't have stopped it."  
You shake your head like a dog out of Waterfall, spraying him, which is met with an outraged "NYEH" and his hands coming up to shield his face, as if he wasn't already as wet as he possibly could be. Before long, he's gripping you under your arms to lift you out of the water, and you have to admit you're looking and feeling more than a little pathetic with your soggy, soapy clothes hanging off your frame.

"WHAT A MESS."  
He sets you back down on the edge of the tub, looking sympathetic.  
"WE'LL HAVE THIS FIXED IN A MINUTE, SANS, DON'T WORRY."  
He gets out of the water, stepping onto a towel and quickly drying himself off so he doesn't drip everywhere, removing his hotpants and wringing them out into the sink. You expect him to simply ask for your clothes, next, but instead he steps close, features surprisingly soft - you thought he'd be at least a little annoyed with you, but it seems your clumsiness has awoken his protective streak, instead - gently embracing you with one arm while pulling off your hoodie with the other, throwing it behind himself. For a while he just holds you, rubbing your back, radiating calmness and warmth, then he carefully lifts you up just enough to quickly remove your shorts. 

"I'LL BE RIGHT BACK! FEEL FREE TO GET COMFORTABLE WITHOUT ME!"  
"alright."  
He presses his teeth to your forehead before leaving to, presumably, hang your clothes up to dry or put them in the washing machine or... something. You know nothing about doing laundry. You suddenly feel a little guilty about it - specifically, about making him clean up after you, even at a time like this - sighing as you carefully lower yourself back into the bathtub.

The sensation of the hot water surrounding you is a purely physical one, as opposed to one enhanced by your magic reacting to someone's intentions, just a dull burn, a pleasant, tingling feeling on the surface of your bones. You're sure a monster with skin, more sensitive to heat and cold, would find this uncomfortable or even painful, but you wouldn't feel much of anything below scalding temperatures. You scoop up some bubbles to give yourself the fantastic mustache/beard combo your lack of follicles had always prevented you from cultivating.

Papyrus is back before you know it, carrying a pair of fluffy pyjamas, always thinking ahead. He freezes when he looks at you.  
"YOU DON'T, BY ANY CHANCE, FEEL LIKE YOU MUSTACHE ME A QUESTION, DO YOU?"  
"nah. this thing's actually making me feel pretty wise. like i've already got the answers to everything."  
"HMM."  
He raises an eyebrow as he puts the dry clothes down, facing you and crossing his arms.  
"THEN, WOULD YOU MAYBE LIKE TO TELL ME HOW YOUR FEELINGS TOWARDS YOUR FACIAL HAIR HAVE SHIFTED RECENTLY?"  
You lean back in the tub, completely straight-faced.  
"well, i didn't really like it at first, but then i got used to it."  
His jaw falls open, his face betraying a mix of disbelief, frustration, and even more frustration at himself for even feeling frustrated at all when being spared your cheesy puns was exactly what he'd always wanted. You close your eyes. There's a slight tinge of desperation to your brother's voice.   
"YES, WELL, I GUESS YOU COULD EVEN SAY IT..."  
"...took me a while to learn to appreciate it, yeah."  
His scream of agony is delicious. You open one eye to see him covering most of his face with his hands, but the corner of his mouth is twitching upwards. You've still got it.  
"SANS, YOU REMEMBER WHAT I SAID ABOUT YOU TEASING ME, DON'T YOU?"  
"who's teasing. we were just having a friendly conversation."  
"DON'T YOU PLAY INNOCENT WITH ME!!!"  
You can't hide your self-satisfied grin as he finally steps into the bathtub, kneeling over you, and you immediately put your hands on his hip bones, rubbing small circles into them.  
"i wouldn't dream of it."

He hums as he leans down towards you, and, damn, it's moments like these where you realise just how much he towers over you. You'd be lying if you said you didn't like it. You close your eyes and lean in to kiss him-  
"UGH, STOP!"  
You practically feel your soul dropping out of your chest. What did you-   
Oh.  
Papyrus is narrowing his eyes as he swipes a finger across your face to remove your bubble beard.  
"I DON'T WANT THIS STUFF GETTING IN MY MOUTH AGAIN!"  
You giggle, both relieved and amused, as he pecks you on your newly bare cheek.  
"NARROWLY AVOIDED HAVING TO TASTE SOAP TWICE IN ONE DAY, THERE."  
He gives you another opportunity, but you continue to refuse to take it, more interested in nuzzling him.  
"...IT WAS A REALLY CLOSE SHAVE, IF YOU'RE WONDERING."  
You laugh, deciding to keep your snappy comeback to yourself in favour of finally pressing your teeth against his, sighing happily. You're still sitting up, and he's slowly sliding his knees behind himself, arms wrapped around your neck, hanging on to you while stretching out until his feet touch the edge of the tub, the water making both of you feel like you weigh almost nothing.

The kiss is a long one, alternating in pressure, teeth slowly sliding across each other, causing something like sparks of magic, and after a while you completely lose yourself in it. Everything feels hazy, but in a warm, good way, the connection between your mouths the only thing that matters, the freely given, openly received affection filling up your soul while simultaneously making it feel lighter. When he pulls back, it's ever so slightly, his forehead resting against yours as he gets back into a position where he has his hands free, and he's almost in your lap, now, kneeling above your thighs and leaning over you, surrounding you completely, shielding you from the outside world. Your face is lit up by a smile you couldn't will away if your life depended on it.

Through your haze, you suddenly realise he's holding a red washcloth, about the size of his hand. It looks... no, it feels incredibly soft, at least when he's the one using it on you, dragging it across your clavicles while keeping your faces close, showering it with little kisses. You guess he actually is planning on taking the opportunity to get cleaned up, not just loaf around in the bathtub - not that you're complaining, if it'll keep feeling like this. The piece of cloth goes from one side of your ribcage to the other and you practically melt into the caresses, going completely limp, sinking deeper into the water. You can't remember the last time you felt so thoroughly relaxed.

"NYEH HEH HEH..."  
You look at Papyrus through half-lidded eyes.  
"what's... what's so funny?"  
He removes his hand from your chest, and for a second you don't know where it is, the bubbles obscuring your view, but then- Then you moan, shakily, as it's firmly pressed against your spine, sliding up and down, the foreign texture making you shiver.  
"NOTHING."  
He pulls you up a bit in order to nuzzle your neck.  
"YOU'RE JUST CUTE."  
That... doesn't sound like something anybody should be able to say about you. You'd always thought of yourself as awkward, and gross, and kind of ridiculous looking, and it had never really bothered you, wasn't something you were interested in trying to change with how much effort it'd take, but...  
"you're... you're the one who's cute, bro."  
"WELL, NATURALLY."  
He alternates between gently squeezing your spine through the fabric and pushing his hand flat against it. Your toes curl involuntarily.  
"WE BOTH ARE. WE'RE ALSO VERY CUTE TOGETHER, IF YOU ASK ME!"  
"heh..."

The cloth travels sideways, across your back ribs, his bare hand coming up to your vertebrae to take its place, and all the while he's kissing, even nipping at your neck. You're not really used to this much stimulation, but so far it's gentle enough not to be overwhelming. You moan appreciatively, your bones feeling like they're heating up from the inside, until- 

Papyrus pushes a finger into one of the disks in your spine, and a sharp, uncomfortable sensation shoots through your marrow, making you wince. How could he have enjoyed that, it feels so weird and invasive and unpleasant...  
"p-papyrus, stop."  
"HMM?"  
He does, looking at you with concern in his eyes.  
"don't- stop everything, just, maybe don't do that thing with, uh, the cartilage?"  
"AH! MY APOLOGIES, BROTHER!"  
He seems completely undeterred, thank god, as he keeps running his fingers along your spine, firmly, but without pressing into your softer parts.  
"IS THAT BETTER?"  
The dull ache left behind by the indentation fades away.  
"yeah, that- that's good."  
"SO, FRICTION FEELS GOOD, BUT TOO MUCH PRESSURE DOESN'T... NYEH HEH HEH. THIS CALLS FOR FURTHER EXPERIMENTATION, I THINK."

Several of your encounters have ended up with you lying underneath Papyrus while he does his best to make you come apart at the seams, working you over almost methodically, his face full of concentration as he traces, squeezes and strokes every bone in your body and intently observes your reactions, which works out great for you. He's having fun, and you're doing what you do best: Absolutely nothing. Not that you never repay the favour, you just, still can't get nearly as into it as he does, more self-conscious and afraid of hurting him than anything.

He leans back in, mouth against your neck, fingers against your spine, cloth against the inside of your sternum, easily one of your most sensitive spots, slowly increasing the speed of his caresses. You're breathing heavily, letting out little "mmm"s and "ah"s, drifting further and further away from reality until there's nothing but the sensations, nothing but him, when suddenly-

Papyrus closes his teeth around your neck. He doesn't actually bite you, but you still yelp and instinctively curl in on yourself, forcing him away.  
"SANS? CAN I TRY..."  
"uh..."  
You don't want him to think you don't trust him. He has himself perfectly under control, you know it. You do your best to relax, baring your neck to him. He... sure looks excited. Your soul is pulsating anxiously.

He returns to his earlier ministrations, rubbing and stroking until the heat becomes almost unbearable, fogging your brain, making you uselessly buck your hips into every current that passes along your pelvis, and just when you've forgotten all about them, the top of your spinal column is back between his teeth. You tilt your head back, this time, giving him access, and he hums happily as he bites down just a little, just enough not to hurt, and... drags the edges of his teeth across your neck. The sensation makes you shudder, then whimper, the contrast between the sharp, grazing edges and the softness of the fabric on the inside of your ribcage is dizzying, and, god, this is how you die. It's a pretty good way to go, really. It's fine. He's pinning you down, now, chest pressed against yours, and no matter how much you squirm and cling to him, he won't give you the contact you're so desperate for. 

You're more than used to feeling powerless, passive, on the edge of breaking, but not to willingly giving yourself up, not to freely letting go of everything, not to feeling so completely safe despite it. You're actually experiencing those things in a positive context, now, and it's oddly... cleansing, almost. Choosing to be vulnerable with someone and having that trust pay off is like... It's like finally being allowed to fall apart after years of barely holding together, only to be glued back into one piece, sturdier, stronger, built on a foundation of love and caring instead of some strange mix of stress and apathy.

You're not thinking about this in such eloquent terms, of course.  
The only word currently going through your mind is "please".  
It's the only word out of your mouth, too, you dimly realise, you must've been chanting it for a while.

"pa... ha... pyrus, please, i can't... i can't take anymore..."  
You need him, you need him closer, you need him rutting against you more than you've ever needed anything-  
"NYEH HEH HEH... STILL THINK YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN TEASE, SANS?"  
What- Oh, god, is he still considering this payback for your stupid puns? Or, lack of stupid puns. You were practically having a spiritual experience down here and he was still bent on petty revenge, unbelievable. You laugh, but it turns into a more of a pathetic mewl half-way through.  
"bro, seriously, please..."  
He looks pretty desperate himself, panting just as heavily as you without even being touched. The cloth is removed from your ribcage, and, no, that's the exact opposite of what you wanted, but not a second later he finally reaches down towards your pelvis and wraps it around your coccyx, god, yes.

He's just holding it there, so you do your best to thrust into his hand, moaning loudly, tightly gripping his ribs, and there must be something about your face he really likes, because when you lock eyes with him a small, helpless noise escapes him and you can pinpoint the exact moment where he finally breaks.

He roughly grabs your pelvis and shoves his pubis up against yours, hissing at the contact, and at first your desperate bucking and his thrusting don't match up at all, preventing you from actually getting anywhere, but then you finally find your rhythm, hips moving in little circles in opposite directions, the water making any larger motions difficult, but also decreasing the friction so much you can grind on each other as hard as you like.

Neither of you can keep your voice down for long. You don't even try, practically howling with sweet relief and overwhelming pleasure as soon as you're moving together, and Papyrus makes a valiant attempt to muffle his cries against your shoulder, but in the end it's all in vain. You'll regret this later, as soon as you have to look your neighbours in the eyes again, but right now you couldn't care less.

"SSSANS, AH, DO YOU THINK YOU CAN..."  
"mmm, m'trying, bro..."  
You just have to... not think about it. Keep your mind blank. Remember the way you were feeling earlier, letting yourself drift wherever the currents will carry you, don't even try chasing that moment of perfect bliss, let it come to you... Insecurities churn in your soul, every time, no matter how good you feel, reflexively clamping down on your magic, like some part of you still doesn't want you to have this, can't believe you'd deserve to have this, you hate it, you hate it, you hate yourself...

You're practically sobbing, totally overstimulated, it's too much and still not enough and you just can't, you can't reach...  
One of Papyrus' hands cups your cheek, pressing his face against yours, and his other hand goes down to the cloth that's still wrapped around your coccyx.   
Papyrus...  
"I'M SO CLOSE, SANS, I NEEEED YOU TO, AH, HAAA, PLEASE, RELAX..."  
Maybe, if you can't chase those thoughts away, you can replace them with others. You close your eyes and think of nothing but your brother. His smile, and his kindness, and his diligence, and his trust and his loyalty, and his touch, and his love, you love him, you love him, he loves you...

"oh, god, papyrus, PAPYRUS-"  
"SANS, YES-"  
You white out completely, clinging to him with the last of your strength as your soul finally stops resisting your climax, and when you come off your momentary high, you're left completely exhausted and shaking in the now cold water. Papyrus gathers you up in his arms.   
"I'M... SO PROUD OF YOU, SANS, THAT WAS GREAT..."  
He nuzzles your faces together, and you weakly reciprocate, feeling like every last bit of energy has been drained from your body. You... don't think you can get up.

Luckily, you don't have to. He lifts you up and out of the bathtub, and when your legs threaten to give out upon making contact with the floor, he keeps holding you steady, sits down and places you in his lap before grabbing a towel to carefully dry you off with. You could do that yourself, but, hey, it feels pretty nice, and you're not gonna say no to him actually enabling your laziness for once.

"HEY, SANS, REMEMBER HOW YOU TOLD ME NOT TO SCREAM YOUR NAME?"  
...Ah, hell.  
"SEEMS TO ME LIKE YOU SHOULD HAVE WORRIED ABOUT YOURSELF, FIRST!"  
"yeah, you got me."  
You lean sideways against his chest, yawning.  
"i really hope that won't have any... repercussions, or anything. our neighbours know we're brothers, right?"  
"WELL, IF THEY DIDN'T KNOW IT BEFORE, THEY CERTAINLY DO, NOW."  
You wince. He seems more amused than anything, but gossip spreads fast. How irresponsible can you be, and after all this was your idea in the first place...  
"AW, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, SANS. WE DON'T EVEN KNOW IF THEY WERE HOME. I'M SURE IT'S FINE."  
He hands you the comfy, dark blue pyjamas he bought for you when you moved in, covered in little constellations and galaxies, kids' size 12. You wear them with pride. Somehow, you manage to put them on while still rolling around on the floor.

"ALRIGHT, LAZYBONES, ON YOUR FEET, COME ON!"  
You make exaggerated groaning noises as he helps you up. You stand, hunched over, holding on to a cabinet door, for about five seconds, then promptly let yourself collapse back onto the bathroom floor.  
"these old bones... just aren't what they used to be..."  
He looks down at you, hands on his hips, thoroughly unimpressed.  
"SANS, YOU'RE IN YOUR TWENTIES."  
"go on... go on ahead without me... leave me here..."  
"I'M NOT GOING TO CARRY YOU AGAIN! YOU CAN AT LEAST MAKE IT TO YOUR BED ON YOUR OWN!"  
You grab his ankle, face-down on the floor.  
"you've still got a... long life ahead of you..."  
"OH MY GOD!!!"  
He takes a step towards the door, and you just keep holding on to his foot, getting dragged along behind him.  
"YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!"  
You look up at him just to give him an obnoxious wink, pointing at a particularly bright star on your shoulder.  
"'course i'm not sirius. this is."  
You swear you can actually see him go through all seven stages of grief in less than ten seconds. When he reaches "acceptance", he... crumples down next to you, joining you on the floor.

"THAT'S IT, BROTHER. I GIVE UP."  
You turn over to join him in staring at the ceiling.  
"oh no..."  
"NOW NEITHER OF US IS GETTING ANYWHERE, EVER. WE'RE DOOMED."  
He turns his head towards you.  
"AND IT'S ALL THANKS TO YOU."  
"i know... i was weak..."  
You could probably fall asleep right here, but... No, you have a better idea.  
"alright, bro. i see how it is."  
You slowly stand up, grunting with the effort.  
"it's time... for me to step up... and be a hero."  
"SANS, WHAT-"  
You get one hand underneath his knees and do your best to support his back with the other, the length of your arms making it difficult...  
"OH MY GOD??? THIS ISN'T GOING TO WORK???"  
...And pull him upwards with all your might. He does his best to cling to you, "NYEH"ing in shock as he's lifted up... ever so slightly. His feet and pelvis almost touch the ground. It looks pretty ridiculous.   
"alright, bro, open the door, i'm getting us out of here."  
"YOU SHOULD HAVE REALLY THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE-"  
"papyrus, seriously, i can't carry you for much longer."  
You almost tumble out of the door into the hallway, losing your balance when one of Papyrus' arms lets go of you, and just as you catch yourself again and get your first glance outside...

There's Alphys, standing with her back to you, and the shock really does make you fall backwards, too suddenly for anyone to grab the door handle and pull it closed in time. Papyrus scrambles away from you, and you're just about to take a shortcut out of this potential catastrophe when she turns around, the noise catching her attention.

Whelp.  
You're boned.

"Oh, Sans, I was wondering who was in there."  
Papyrus squeezes himself against the wall.   
"alphys, since when... how long have you been here? shouldn't you still be at your movie?"  
"Ugh, well, it turns out the English voice actors and localizers totally ruined it - I mean, of course I haven't seen the original, but sometimes you can just immediately tell, you know how it is - so, uh, I kind of decided to leave early and catch the subbed version when it goes online?"  
She looks around - Most likely wondering where your brother went. You told her you'd both be chilling at home.

"Undyne wanted to stay, though. She got- She got really into seeing all those sword fights on the big screen."  
She's twiddling her thumbs nervously.  
"The other moviegoers weren't too happy about that. I hope she doesn't get into, like... an actual fist fight with the guy she spilled her drink on."  
You raise your eyebrows.  
"A-accidentally! She got so angry at a character, she squeezed her soda cup until it crumpled, and, well, she doesn't like soda much, anyway, but the guy sitting next to her seemed really mad about it..."  
Her face scrunches up as she forces herself to look more at ease than she really is.  
"But hey! I'm sure it's fine. She... can definitely take care of herself."  
You casually take a step towards her. Maybe, if you can just direct her away from the door...  
"well. good thing i didn't waste my money on tickets, too."  
You wink.   
"i bet watching undyne nail that guy to the wall is gonna be way more entertaining than the movie was. she's like a real life-"  
"Real life anime heroine, oh my god, I know, right???"  
She's genuinely grinning now, tiny clawed hands on her cheeks. Heh. She seems slightly embarrassed about her reaction, too, quickly collecting herself again, and you stand in awkward silence for a while, trying to come up with a way to get her to move.

"So... Are you gonna let me into the bathroom now? I kinda gotta go."  
That sure is... unfortunate.  
"well..."  
"C'mon, I've had all these human soft drinks..."  
As she's stepping past you, you have to make a split-second decision between trying to stop her now and trying to talk your way out of this later- You can't think of a good reason to keep her out of the bathroom, and you're certainly not going to make yourself seem infinitely more suspicious by physically stopping her without one, so you decide to play it cool and take your chances. 

...Nevermind. Papyrus has other plans. Namely, dooming you. He must've panicked and tried to hide himself... by standing behind the towel rack. 

Alphys stares at it for a while, seemingly speechless.  
"Uh... Papyrus?"  
He peeks out from behind his ineffective hiding place.  
"AH! HELLO, ALPHYS! I, UH, DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE!"  
She silently stares at him, bewilderment written all over her face.  
"BECAUSE... BECAUSE I WAS STANDING BEHIND THIS TOWEL, YOU SEE."  
Poor guy really doesn't do well under pressure.  
"A-ANYWAY, I'LL JUST LEAVE YOU TO IT, THEN!"  
That makes her snap out of it.  
"Wait, Papyrus, why- why were you hiding in here?"  
He's almost made it out of the room when he freezes mid-step and turns around to face her.  
"E-EXCUSE ME?"  
"Come to think of it... Why were you even in here at all?"  
"I, UH, I MEAN, IT'S A BATHROOM..."  
She narrows her eyes.  
"You guys don't need bathroom breaks. A-and besides, why were you locked in here with Sans?"  
She looks at the fogged-up mirror.  
"He was taking a bath, wasn't he?"  
Papyrus' jaw looks like it's about to drop off his face. It'd be funny if it wasn't so nerve-wracking.  
"WELL- YES, HE WAS! BUT, I FEEL LIKE YOU MIGHT BE MAKING SOME ASSUMPTIONS HERE, THAT AREN'T NECESSARILY TRUE?"  
"I'm... really not sure what to think right now, actually?"  
"WELL, THEN, WORRY NO LONGER, BECAUSE I AM ABOUT TO TELL YOU! WHAT TO THINK!"  
He glances over at you, hoping you'll help him out, but you honestly have no idea how. He's dug himself a pretty deep hole, here. You shrug helplessly. 

So much for not making him lie to his friends.

"YOU SEE, THE THING IS, I ONLY JUST GOT HERE!"  
"And... then you locked the door behind you?"  
"NO, I... I DIDN'T COME IN THROUGH THE DOOR AT ALL!"  
What the hell?  
"I CAME IN THROUGH THE WINDOW! JUST AFTER SANS WAS... DONE. ALREADY DRESSED AND EVERYTHING."  
Alphys clearly shares the sentiment. Papyrus backs up towards the wall opposite of the door.  
"I WENT OUT IN MY PAJAMAS FOR A SECOND, AND, UH, NATURALLY I WAS VERY EMBARRASSED ABOUT THAT, SO INSTEAD OF RISKING SOMEBODY SEEING ME BY COMING IN THROUGH THE DOOR..."  
He opens the window, eyes fixed on Alphys all the while. Wait, he wouldn't... Surely he hasn't forgotten...  
"SO I DECIDED TO TAKE THE DIRECT WAY-"  
Papyrus actually is stepping out through the window, either to demonstrate or just to escape. His foot hits nothing but air, and a split second later, he's gone, leaving you with nothing but the single most shocked "NYEH" you've ever heard.

You live in a second story apartment. 

You rush towards the window, hoping to magically break his fall, but it's too late, he hits the ground with a dull thump- not a cracking noise, thank god.  
"I'M FINE!!!"  
You lean outside and give him a thumbs up.  
"PHYSICALLY, AT LEAST!"  
Oh boy.

Alphys softly clears her throat behind you. When you don't react, she speaks up again.  
"Sans, I'm- I'm not trying to embarrass you, or be n-nosy or anything, but, uh, aren't you two a little, way too old to be... t-taking baths together?"  
You turn around to face her, winking half-heartedly.  
"somebody in this apartment has to do their part to save water, alphys. and your girlfriend literally has gills."  
"Sans..."  
"do you really want me to have a hand in the destruction of the environment when we only just got here?"  
You look off to the side, avoiding her eyes.   
"i mean. really."  
Silence falls over you. You'd kind of hoped for at least a chuckle on that one, but no. This is... easily one of the top ten most uncomfortable atmospheres you've ever been a part of.  
"It's... I guess it's none of my business."  
"you guess right."

She walks away, and for one merciful moment you think she'll actually leave it at that, but of course she turns around one more time. It really wouldn't be dramatic, otherwise.  
"B-but... I'm still your friend. And lately you've been acting..."  
You're not really interested in having this conversation. You've had it, or variations of it, way too many times, if you're being honest. You look out the window again, admiring the sunset.  
"...Well, I don't think you're unhappy, exactly? But..."  
You don't have to look at her to know she's nervously shifting her weight from one foot to the other.  
"I-It's not... It's not good to keep secrets, Sans. It's not healthy. It eats you up f-from the inside, and-"  
"i know, alphys."  
"I... I mean it! A-and maybe you think it's for the best, or that you d-don't have a choice, or that you don't have anyone's s-support, but that's not..."  
"i know, alphys. believe me, i know."  
"A-Alright then. Sorry, I mean... Sorry."

You hear her retreat into her bedroom and lock the door behind her. You feel vaguely bad about shrugging her words of support off like that, you're well aware she's only trying to help, but...  
You sigh, deeply. You'll apologise later.  
When you finally leave the bathroom, you see Papyrus sitting on the living room sofa, his knees drawn up to his chest.  
"SANS!"  
"decided to take the door this time, huh?"  
"ARGH! DON'T REMIND ME OF MY SHAME!"  
You sit down next to him, leaning against him as he wraps an arm around your shoulders.  
"I'M... SORRY FOR MESSING UP."  
You stare off into the distance.  
"IS IT BAD? I MEAN, DO YOU... DO YOU THINK SHE KNOWS?"  
"she won't tell anyone."  
"...OH."  
"and it's not your fault. it wasn't anyone's fault. just crappy timing."  
"...OKAY."  
You're so tired.  
"I'M... KIND OF RELIEVED, I THINK."  
"yeah?"  
"YEAH. THAT SOMEBODY KNOWS, I MEAN."  
You sit in silence.  
"IF SHE... IF SHE REALLY WON'T TELL ANYONE, THEN IT'S FINE, RIGHT?"  
You don't want to deal with this right now. You don't want to deal with anything else today. You shouldn't have had to deal with any of this, you should have carried your brother to bed and shared some dumb laughs about it and fallen asleep with your head on his chest. That's all you want to do.

He can sense your mood, it seems. He gently picks you up and takes you back to your room.  
"WE SHOULD PROBABLY TALK TO HER ABOUT IT."  
You close your eyes.  
"...TOMORROW."  
Maybe you'll dream of a time and place where you don't disappoint Papyrus. Don't utterly fail at protecting him. Don't end up only hurting him more when you try. Just once. You hope for that pretty much every night, but...  
You're beginning to think nothing like that has ever existed.   
You haven't made the right decisions, not even once.  
You just want to sleep.

\---

You really do apologise to Alphys. She makes it clear that she'll always support your life choices, so long as they aren't hurting anyone. You appreciate that. She promises to keep it to herself if you aren't ready to tell anyone, yet. You appreciate that, too. She soon overcomes her shyness about the topic and attempts to bond with you over your shared secret... in increasingly awkward ways. You appreciate that less.

No, you don't want to watch Oreimo with her. No, you're not going to stop calling him your brother. Yes, you really do kiss by just clicking your teeth together. Yes, that is pretty adorable. No, you're not going to tell her how two skeletons "do it" without anything "down there". No, it's okay to be curious, she's only making this more uncomfortable by apologising a thousand times, Alphys, please.

Overall, it's still a better experience than being completely unable to talk about your brofriend with anyone. Gushing about your respective partners really does bring you closer together, and it almost makes you feel... normal, for a while. You worry that the more casual you get about it, the more likely she is to let it slip around others, but... For now, you're actually pretty happy with how things turned out.

Papyrus certainly appreciates having someone to confide in. You should've known how good this would be for him, how much better it is than obsessively clinging to his reputation as if the slightest hit to it would make him universally loathed, as if the opinions of friends weren't endlessly more important than those of strangers. You can't believe you made such a big deal out of just one person knowing about your relationship. All that melodrama only filled both of your lives with unnecessary anxiety, deprived you of so much time you could've spent together, made it feel more wrong than it should have.

Now there's only one person in this household who isn't privy to your secret. She's currently sitting next to Papyrus on the couch, watching some kind of cooking show and loudly criticising the lack of passion in the contestants' dishes. Papyrus "NYEH"s along enthusiastically.  
"This is weird. Falafel isn't usually made with meat..."  
Her fist comes down on the armrest.  
"...It's made with BLOOD, SWEAT, AND TEARS!"  
"THATS' RIGHT!!!"  
Papyrus' face belatedly scrunches up with disgust.  
"WAIT, IS THAT REALLY RIGHT?"  
"OH MY GOD! NO!!!"  
She laughs, shovelling popcorn into her mouth. Her next words are muffled, accompanied by bits of it spraying everywhere.  
"We should totally try it some time, though! I'm sure we could do better!"  
"I DON'T KNOW, I THINK I'VE KIND OF LOST MY APPETITE..."

He casually puts an arm around your shoulders and pulls you towards himself. You don't pull back as quickly as you would've a few weeks ago, but you're still... uncertain.  
"uh..."  
Papyrus looks at you, alarmed, and fakes a yawn as he slowly raises and retracts his arm again. That's... the exact opposite of how that move is usually done. Sure enough, Undyne notices, glaring at you behind Papyrus' back. You still have no idea why she keeps doing that. You're a little uncomfortable, honestly.

You grab your half-finished bag of chips - human brand, no extra "s" - and get up to leave. You don't think you and Undyne will ever get along, you're just too fundamentally different.  
"i'll be, uh, heading to my room."  
"MAKE YOUR BED WHILE YOU'RE IN THERE, WON'T YOU?"  
Ugh.  
"i was planning to nap in it, actually."  
"SO NAP IN YOUR PERFECTLY MADE BED! OR TAKE MINE, IF YOU MUST. YOU NEED TO START DEVELOPING SOME MORE USEFUL HABITS."  
This time, the "ugh" is vocalised. Papyrus turns around to look at you, making the skeleton equivalent of puppy eyes.  
"PLEASE, SANS. FOR ME."  
That is... so unfair.  
"...fine."

You hear him smugly, but affectionately chuckle as you leave. Just as you're about to close the door behind you...  
"Alright, Papyrus. We need to talk."  
"HUH?"  
Oh, this can't mean anything good. You close the door, loudly, so they'll think you're gone, and take a shortcut behind the kitchenette, hiding there just in case you have to step in.

Undyne takes a deep breath.  
"That look in your eyes... I know it well."  
"FEAR???"  
"No, the one you had before!!! When Sans was leaving!"  
"I'M... NOT SURE WHAT YOU MEAN?"  
"I'm pretty sure you actually are sure!"  
She sighs exasperatedly.  
"Listen, I've been watching this go on for long enough-"  
"WHAT, SANS' LAZINESS? BECAUSE I AGREE-"  
"No!!! Stop changing the subject!"  
You risk a glance above the counter and immediately retreat again. She's standing in front of your brother, now, who's practically cowering on the couch.

"Papyrus! It's time to get serious!"  
"I, I STILL DON'T..."  
"As you know, I've been in your situation before!"  
"WH- YOU HAVE???"  
You're pretty shocked yourself. You didn't even know she had a sister.  
"Of course! And I haven't forgotten how you supported me through those hard times..."  
Oh. Oh god.  
"...so I feel that, as your trusted friend and roommate, it is nothing less than my duty to support you now!"  
That kind of situation.  
"Also, I'm just SUPER SICK OF WATCHING YOU TWO BEAT AROUND THE BUSH!"  
You hear a thump- You guess she just jumped onto the couch table for maximum drama.  
"LISTEN UP, PAPYRUS! YOU'VE RUN FROM YOUR FEELINGS LONG ENOUGH!"  
"UNDYNE..."  
"I'M HERE TO TELL YOU! THAT IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO FACE THEM HEAD ON!!!"  
You cover your mouth to keep from laughing. You'd be able to hear every word of this even if you were behind a locked door.  
"I'M GOING TO HELP YOU CONFESS YOUR... YOUR WEIRD BROTHER CRUSH TO SANS!!!"  
There's a moment of silence.  
"I mean, he's either one obnoxiously oblivious asshole, or genuinely disinterested and too much of a wuss to say it, but either way, we're going to clear the air once and for-"  
Papyrus is giggling. At first it's relatively subdued, but soon enough it escalates and he's practically howling with laughter. You're grinning so hard it hurts.  
"Papyrus... I get that you're embarrassed, but I'm trying to give a motivational speech, here!"  
He can barely catch his breath enough to talk.  
"OH MY GOD, UNDYNE..."

That's your cue, isn't it? You casually step out from behind the counter.  
"what's this i hear about brother crushing?"  
Undyne looks more than a little perplexed at your sudden appearance, panic in her eyes as she tries to figure out just how much of that you must have heard. Papyrus is still laughing, shoulders shaking.  
"WELL, SANS, UNDYNE WAS JUST TRYING... HA..."  
He takes a second to calm down, then he kneels on the couch, elbows on the backrest, head resting in his hands, smiling brightly.  
"TRYING TO GET ME TO CONFESS THAT I'M BASICALLY MADLY IN LOVE WITH YOU!"  
You wink at him.  
"nice. wanna make out?"  
"SURE!"

Undyne looks almost horrified. Her confusion is overwhelming enough for her to somehow manage to say "...???" out loud.   
Papyrus' face is at perfect smooching height right now, so you just walk forwards until your feet hit the sofa and your teeth bump against his. Undyne narrows her eyes, mouth hanging open, seemingly re-evaluating her entire life.  
"...Mission accomplished, I guess???"  
Papyrus is giggling again. You peck him on the cheek before looking up at her.  
"'fraid you're a couple months too late, there."  
"...What???"  
Papyrus turns around.  
"WE JUST... WE WERE JUST WORRIED, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW... THIS KIND OF THING ISN'T REALLY... SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE? SO WE DID OUR BEST NOT TO TELL ANYONE..."  
Undyne raises her palm to interrupt him.  
"Wait, wait, wait a second, you just... knowingly let me make a fool out of myself?"  
Realisation dawns on her face, soon followed by rage.  
"You let me buy TWO SINGLE BEDS for you guys when a double would have been SO MUCH CHEAPER???"  
She gets into a fighting stance.  
"PAPYRUS!!!"  
"OH NO!"  
"GET READY TO HAVE THE LIFE NOOGIED OUT OF YOU, NERD!!!"  
He scrambles over the backrest of the sofa, almost knocking it over, and Undyne goes chasing after him, laughing maniacally.

Huh.

That went pretty well.

\---

You sit down to have a serious talk with Undyne, later. She's downright offended that you ever could've thought she'd have anything but Papyrus' best interests in mind. And yours, too. She does consider you a friend, you know. Even if you are kind of annoying sometimes.

You grow more and more comfortable with being seen together - Technically, it's a double date every time the four of you go out. Today, you're having a picnic in the park, blanket spread out in the middle of a giant, grassy field, more green than you ever thought you'd see in one place, more light than you ever thought would be shining down on you, the sky a deep, endless blue with only a few fluffy clouds obscuring it, like something out of an illustration in one of Papyrus' books.

You're leaning against his chest, his arms around you, his chin resting on top of your head, his knees drawn up on either side of you, and Undyne and Alphys are quite literally mirroring your position, sitting back-to-back with him. A little ways off, you see the kid and Toriel, playing with that annoying dog they ended up adopting. It still mysteriously ends up at your place, sometimes, usually just to make trouble, but you don't mind if it means your pun buddy will come over to get him back and stay for a slice of pie or two. 

"That one kind of looks like... like somebody flexing, maybe?"  
"No way! That'd be the most pathetic flex I've ever seen in my life, it's totally a teapot!"  
"I THINK IT COULD ALSO BE A CAMEL? WHAT DO YOU THINK, SANS?"  
You open one of your eyes.  
"cumulus humilis, i think."  
Papyrus groans softly.

You let your eyes fall closed again, the chatter of your friends slowly fading into the background, a soft breeze blowing past and, well, through you, your brother's ribcage slowly rising and descending behind you. You feel... peaceful. Serene, even, and you realise... You realise there's no reason why this shouldn't last. You have nothing left to worry about. The anomaly has left your timeline alone ever since you made it out of the underground. All of your friends are safe. Papyrus is happy. You're...

You're happy.  
You feel his teeth on your temple and snuggle closer, all the tension leaving your body as you let yourself drift off into a deep, dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AU where Sans' bed isn't in the corner of his room, but rather around the half-way point of the right wall, where I also suspect a window to be. 
> 
> Sweet merciful Jesus, this turned out much longer than expected. Like, three times as long.
> 
> The switch to Sans' POV is probably disappointing, and I apologise, but as I sketched this chapter out, I realised there were some scenes I wanted to do that Papyrus just plain couldn't be there for. The whole thing is probably disappointing, considering the surprisingly and overwhelmingly nice feedback the first chapter got, but what can you do. I'm just glad to have finished it. 
> 
> This story is 100% done now! I have no idea what to write next, if anything. I guess I'm taking Undertale requests, fontcest or not - Just don't expect me to actually fill all or even most of them, I'll be pretty busy.

**Author's Note:**

> AU where Papyrus' bed is wide enough to accommodate all the moves described in this fanfic. I guess it's a two-seater.
> 
> I haven't written anything creative since middle school, so I apologise for the somewhat... bare bones style I've got going on here. English isn't my native language, if that counts for anything, and I'm really generally not sure what to do, other than just describe what I'm imagining? Also, second person POV is a bad thing to do, I know, but I just kind of automatically slip into it whenever I think about Undertale, and it certainly does make differentiating between two characters using the same pronouns a whole lot easier. 
> 
> Anyway. This whole thing is unbelievably, horrifically self-indulgent, but these sweet skels have been my happy place, lately, and I'm sure others feel the same, so I thought I might as well share. There really isn't enough stuff written from Papyrus' perspective.


End file.
